Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work, PairedLife

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work

People in long distance relationships are like the kid in your class who does the extra hard math problems at the end of each section just for joy. Or the person who wakes up at 4AM to run sixteen miles every day, up a mountain in the rain. They’re doing what most of us do, except they’re making it a thousand times tighter than it needs to be. Relationships are often confusing, brain-hurting messes of enigmas, even without five thousand miles in inbetween you and your significant other. Add distance in and hoo boy, are you in for a bumpy rail.

Never is a harsh word. But it’s lighter to say than "More often than not, these relationships don’t work out" or "In most cases, they usually don’t work out." So what I truly mean is: Here are some reasons why you should think twice before kicking off a long distance relationship. Because they, more often than not, in most cases, don’t work out.

1) It’s Hard to Trust Someone You Hardly See in Person

You’re putting a lot of faith in someone far far away, who you often have no reliable means of checking up on (internet movie talks don’t count). Building trust is a key component in any relationship, and building that trust requires face time. It’s being able to look into that person’s face and see his commitment to you. Observing it in person.

When it comes to trust, talk is cheap. Anybody can say they’re trustworthy. Anyone can say they love you. But you need to see it to believe it. Real genuine trust is shown in a person’s deeds, not just words. In long distance relationships, you see each other so infrequently that it’s raunchy to build up that trust. You visit each other, then go back to your separate lives, without a clue what the other person is doing while you’re away for the next five weeks. How are you supposed to build long lasting trust?

Two) It Usually Leads to Cheating

Unfortunate, but true. Not in every case, but in many. Let’s face the facts: Your significant other is miles and miles away, you’re lonely and depressed about it, and there are tons of single people in the town where you live. Statistically, you’re most likely going to think about cheating.

Unlike cheating when your significant other lives down the block, cheating in long distance relationships is slightly understandable. [Tho’ by a very meager percent. Cheating is terrible, and I very suggest not doing it to anyone.] You can’t see your significant other whenever you want, unlike in most relationships, and you’re only human. Most people would only be able to hold out for so long before the arms of somebody way more convenient (and local) embark looking real good. If you’re one of the good ones, you’ll end your long distance relationship before it comes to the cheating stage. But it’s effortless to be tempted if you’re thinking there’s no way your significant other will find out about your straying.

Three) Distance Leads to Frustration. Frustration Leads to Fighting. Fighting Leads to Break Ups. It’s the Unpreventable Cycle of Long Distance Relationships.

Nobody thinks about the distance in their relationship and goes, HOORAY! This is so much joy! It’s frustrating, for everyone. You’re commencing off your relationship at a point of frustration. Yes, frustration leads to fighting, which leads to breakups in general, but you’re beginning your relationship with frustration. Most relationships commence off at a neutral point. If things get bad later, it’s because differences and incompatibilities build up, creating a frustrating situation. With long distance relationships, the frustration is built right into the fabric.

Four) These Relationships Go on Way Longer Than They Should.

In brief distance relationships (nobody calls them that, but just go with it), when things embark getting indeed bad, a break up usually happens shortly after. [A lot of brief distance relationships also go on way longer than they should. People haul relationships out in general.] But the reason why long distance relationships almost ALWAYS go on longer than they should is because of the distance.

If you see someone every day and fight with them every day, you’ll only be able to take so much before you snap and break up. If you see someone once a month and fight with them once a month, there’s way more time in inbetween for you both to cool down, leave behind why you were fighting, and think your relationship is still working well. And with the distance being so hard, it’s effortless to blame every fight you have (even the long phone ones) on the fact that you’re so far away and missing each other. The fighting could mean that you’re incompatible, but it takes way longer to figure that out when you have the effortless scapegoat of distance to blame instead.

Five) You’ll Never Have a Future Unless You Live in the Same Place.

It’s pretty hard to embark a family when you live in different states. This is visible, but it seems to be something a lot of long distance-ers don’t truly think about until the relationship isn’t going so well. You get frustrated by the distance and then it’s "You need to stir here or this isn’t going to work." Well, that was always true. even when you were thinking about embarking the relationship. In order to have a real future with someone, you have to live in the same place. Relationships are hard enough. Kicking off a relationship off without even having that plain requirement met makes it a zillion times stiffer.

If you truly want a long distance relationship to work, it’s best to have a plan to end the distance soon. Don’t make relationships firmer than they have to be, for howling out noisy. Life is hard enough. Think twice before you bring a situation into your life that’s going to make life even tighter for you. The person better be "the one," with bells and whistles and singing birds, to be worth all that effort. Otherwise, take a stroll down to the local watering fuckhole and find a date there instead.В

Your turn: What was it that made your long distance relationship end? Or, what has made your long distance relationship work?В

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Comments

As a matter of fact I as an old tradition thought have to agree with the fact that the most normal, from natures point of view too relationship is the one where the playmates are close to each other. However nowadays a lot of people including me have switch this idea making it possible to accomplish long distance relationship and made it possible enough to take place into the real world and not in the fantasy world as you wish to call it my dear. it is indeed hard for an Internet relationship to work out some of the time but not most of them. We neither know whether or not the possibilities of making one LDR are less than the ones of a cdr. And let’s be downright fair here it is also a fact that cdrs don’t always work out as imagined or planned by both or one of the playmates. According to your article my dear I can see that most of the things lack evidence during to the unknown number of successes by the relationships that embarked from a ld. Yes life is hard and the real world is harsh, but letc not also leave behind that this real world that most of the people wish to call can be affected by many parts like politics and economics. there are people out there who did things out of imagination such as flying to the moon creating clone humans, inventing robots, finding cures for deadly viruses and turning the unlikely into possible, so if you think for a moment if we compare all those which might seem kinda of unrelated but if you compare all those you can say that making an LDR is not truly that unlikely

I had a long distance romantic correspondence with very occasional meetings. As warned above, it kept going years too long even after I was "committed" to being with someone else. I put many romanticized feelings on the person who was far away but I never knew the real person behind the messages. You may feel that you truly know, or even love, the other person but for me it was my own imagination that made the distant paramour seem ideal. Be careful.

If you begin to love someone who is near you while you secretly attempt to keep your ldr, its a mistake. Ask yourself honestly about whether you truly just love what your imagination lets you see. If that may be the case, cut off your ldr and take the time to know whether you are blessed with what you do have. If you are wooed you truly want the ldr, then you get yourself near that person to see if it works in the skin. Don’t delay.

This is a geyser of crap. LD CD whatever love is love. I never intended to fall in love with someone in Australia. Living in the US makes that about as LD as you can get. However, the best part of this relationship is truly what I just said. I absolutely never intended to fall all in love with someone eight thousand miles away from me. But it happened and I’d be a idiot not to work my culo off to make this work until one of us moves. You may only be blessed with true love once. If it’s real it will work!

th0ught two years ago from Central Fresh York

They certainly are difficult, but as I mentioned in my hub, not unlikely. 🙂

My hubby and I did the entire long distance thing for about one and a half years before we got married. I lived in the States and he I’m Europe. Yes the distance was hard and there were very many days where I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore. But what made it all worth it was the skill that the day was coming when he and I would never have to be separated by distance again.

Any relationship is hard. It does not matter whether you ten miles apart or a state away. Trust is trust. I know many long distance relationship that work because they had a plan to come together. It is about getting to know one. I know many duo in the same city who does not spend any more time that two people in different states.

When two people love one another and talk to each other planning and making goals. Then All things are effortless. Very first you have to find out what do each one wants out of the relationship and go from there.

I met a man nine months ago and when we met he did tell me that a stir was in the pipeline due to a very profitable business promotion. Of course at the time I did not give it too much thought as we did not realise at that stage that we would fall in love with each other. He relocated two months ago and it’s been simply awful. When he comes to me or if I go to him we still don’t get quality time together as he is always busy with work, clients etc. crimson flags did pop up originally eg I have two petite Pekingese dogs that he is not too keen on, he is addicted to the TV. Now however they have become gigantic issues. I think we broke up via text messaging last night, but I’m not even sure of that. Lol.

If your man is a good communicator maybe it is lighter, but in my case it is indeed an aweful practice. We may have not worked out anyway but the agony is being spread now.

Pardon me for telling this but the above article if i may call it an article is a loosely written lump with absolutely no reference to what practice these alcoholic ramblings of the author originate from. I have never read a more one sided argument in any subject whatsoever. And to go to the extent of telling that cheating is understandable? It is ABSOLUTELY NOT..So am i to believe that you are ok with your beau sleeping with another woman or your gf sleeping around with other guys while on a business tour or out of town simply because he/ she is lonely and depressed?. Cheating represents the betrayal of emotions and can be as ordinary as an ”harmless lie” said to ”protect” the other or can go as far as sleeping with another person.Both are exceptionally wrong and exceedingly stupid. I hope this isn’t the way you indeed feel about LDRs and i Truly hope you just posted this lump as a dare from your friends to write something funny.

I would go as far as telling that i find this article to be discriminatory and no one gives you the right to talk down to people in LDRs. These relationships are as true and REAL as any other and they do last but yes it takes hard work and yes we choose to do the extra math problem and run the extra mile . you know why? cos its a feeling somebody as juvenile as you can never understand. I feel sorry for you.

I married my long distance relationship this year. It was slightly different because he was in the army but the trust thing was hard because of a chick he’d been with. When he went home for Christmas she posted fountains of pics of her hugging him and they even stayed in the same hotel room! I have to say, me and him did see eachother every two weeks tho’ because we were both in Europe even however one thousand miles apart.

Grace-Wolf-30 four years ago from England

The kid in class who does the extra hard question just for joy turns out to be a mathematical genius, with a truly fine job, and the person who wakes up at 4am every morning to go for a sixteen mile jog, regardless of the weather, has a healthy heart, fantastic lung capacity, and a peaceful mind. Every relationship is unique, and should be treated so. You know in your heart what is right and what is wrong for you. Nothing worth having comes effortless.

lifeintheworld four years ago from The World

Meh. I was in a long distance relationship for three years. Ended up moving to the same country, still together today. If the people are worth it and put in the effort, it will work.

My beau and i were together in the same place for ten moths before we had to get into a long distance relationship to accommodate our studies. Its two years now and we have two more years to end this distance. All i would like to say here is that it doesn’t matter if its long distance or not. its all about who you are with and how loyal you both are to each other. i love him alot and i know he loves me the same. And our relationship is so beautiful till we sometimes leave behind that we are in a LDR. It only hurts when you cant hold each other and hug each other.

I am in one (LDR) now. Forty five days to be exact today, eish its the most painful thing and mine is collapsing and i did all i could to save it and its driving itself now, i gave up. LDR has its own people,not everyone is meant for it.

I could write about how my beau and I have been making it through with a entire ocean separating us – or you could just read about it here: http://surviving-thedistance.blogspot.co.at/

Everyone who is telling they are in a long distance relationship fail to mentinon who is moving? so you’re in one. and? eventually someone has to stir. And for those who’s LDR worked. did you stir? there is no way its going to work because resentment will embark to build up..You will want that person here with you through the good times and especially the bad.

My bf and I have been together for almost two years. About three months ago, he moved seven hours away from me for schooling. So I do agree with this article in that our frustrations lead to lots of fighting. Long distance is difficult, very difficult at least for me. We facetime twice a week. He isn’t very comfy with me going out on the weekends. I’m also not convenient with going out on the weekends.

But this past weekend, I did something horrible. I went to a concert and drank so much alcohol. After eight or nine shots, I was making out with a man who came with me and my girlfriends. I ended up telling this stud that I find him truly attractive and that him and I would be good together as a duo.

Unluckily, it didn’t end there. Since then we’ve been texting each other. He came to visit me last night at my workplace, and we ended up smooching each other and making out.

I just feel so confused and horrible at the same time. My gf thinks I cheated because of the lack of physicality from my beau. I knew I wasn’t strong enough for a distance relationship. I kept attempting to tell my beau in the beginning that I’m skeptical in having a long distance relationship – but he kept forcing it and said we will turn out fine. I don’t know what to do. I have always had a hatred toward cheaters, but now I feel as however I am a part of them 🙁

I no vanessajoie! It’s very lonely and your rite it is like a marathon! Only thing to do is to keep busy I find. Skype is superb tho’ we talk on it almost every night talk about our day to each other.

my SO and i met last two thousand eight and had a hurricane romance, we were separated by distance after six months because he went to the states and im left here in the Philippines (imagine the miles apart) we stayed in touch and after a year he came back but was only able to stay for less than two weeks, again we didn’t see each other for two years but the love and communication is still there. last april two thousand twelve he came to see me again for three weeks. He’s now back in the states and wont be able to see him again for two years.We’ve had marriage talks so we can be together eventually but something makes the situation complicated everytime.he loves me and i do too. earnestly, i feel like a marathon runner that’s almost reachin the end of race only to be told that they have moved the finish line further. . :(( we’ll be celebrating our 4yr anniversary this september and four years in a row that we have had never celebrated it together. Im still holding on and he does too but i admit im hurting that i cant be with him as often as i want too. Its gettin so lonely for me now.

Looks like my entire marriage, which embarked with eyeing him for the very first time in person at our 7th "monthsary" then the 2nd time after our very first anniversary, is a lie then.

This is a very interesting article, and you’ve undoubtedly made sure to make it as controversial as possible. I used to believe that long-distance relationships were unlikely. I went through many in my life and they never worked out. I always felt I needed that physical companionship.

My current fucking partner and I have been separated by and ocean for almost two years now. Albeit it is unlikely difficult and I’ve had several moments of weakness, especially for physical companionship, we are still going on strong. I suppose a part of this is due to the fact that we have a daughter together. We are also very close to reuniting and that keeps us both motivated to keep going on.

It is the most difficult thing to ever practice, but I believe that if you do truly love someone, then it is possible to make it work up to a point. As human, we all need physical companionship and can only go so long without it. So you are right to say that they don’t -usually- work out, but they certainly may if you truly work at it and want it. As pointed out before, long distance relationships should be a means to an end that results in you actually being together. Not a permanent factor in your ‘relationship’

dashingscorpio five years ago

You made some excellent points. #Five very likely is the truest of them all. The best relationships are inbetween people who actually spend time together! I’ve known people in LDRs who claim they have been together for a year. However they are confusing "calendar time" with actual time. If you only see someone one weekend a month then out of twelve months you have seen them twenty four days out of three hundred sixty five day year!

LDRs were meant to be improvised. At some point for things to last someone has to determine to stir!

Interesting hub! I think what’s significant to recall however is that a lot of long-distance relationships don’t commence out that way, they do embark when you’re living in the same place or relatively close by, it’s just that life might haul you apart. In this case, I indeed have to disagree with the very first two points you made. It’s not hard to trust someone you love, and if it is then you most likely shouldn’t be with them in the very first place. And if you truly love someone, then you won’t even think about cheating on them.

Obviously LDRs are frustrating and you can end up feeling terribly lonely sometimes, but I honestly believe if you love each other and know that you want to be together again in the future then there’s no reason why it shouldn’t work.

Silas Kessler five years ago

Honestly, this article has no concrete backbone to support itself on. It makes it seem like EVERY person in a LDR is gonna cheat, lie, fight, etc. People are people, and we all have different ways of coping with things. I am presently in a LDR with a doll in South Korea, and I’m in the US. I’m Nineteen, and have never had a relationship. (Brief or Long distance!) I’ve had many, many chances, but I’m just picky. This doll on the other palm is special. She is so different than any other dame I’ve met, so i very doubt I’ll get sick of her, and go to the "watering fuckhole" to find some cheap mega-bitch, because I wouldn’t let my female go for anything. Distance is nothing, and the day we meet will be like nothing else. We will savour every 2nd together, rather than take it all for granted.

Hi! I have been in a long distance relationship for Feb 2010. We embarked talking on Facebook and then Sype and then I eventually went to meet him while he was back packing round the Far East in the May. We where madly in love!

He called it a day Just after Fresh year 2012. I found it very difficult. I persuaded him after three months to get back together! I love him very much but we have big problems. He live on an island and I live on the British main land. I have five children one of which has left home. I still have the other four who are dependant on me, because I have been a utter time Mum for a long time I need to go back to education so I can find a well paid job. This will take me a further four years. He hates where I live and doesn’t want to live over here with me so the only other option is for me to live over there but it looks almost unlikely for me to do that because house prices are so high where he lives. The money from the sale of my house wouldn’t even get a one bed plane where he lives. He lives with his parents still because of this! There is no room at his parents for my family. I don’t go out much because I don’t want to attract the rong sort of attention because I still have my looks! I feel Totally isolated and lonely! I find this way of living very difficult!

My Mum had a stroke one and a half years ago. My only sister died nine years ago and my Dad.I had aunts and uncles die in the last few years too! I just feel life is to brief what should I do?

Feel like I’m in a no win situation!

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

I think Lawrence pretty much has all these comments covered. Thanks for looking out, friend.

Lol, glad to be in the minority then.

England-Australia long distance. In a relationship for coming up to four years now, applying for permanent residence with my playmate as a sponsor in Australia on Monday.

Feels good to be awesome.

A truly good blog. So true what Lawrence says, and also so much true in all comments.

I have been a LDR over three thousand kilometers for Ten. years, but now it seems we are violating up. He wrote a mail telling he needs a break, and I do not indeed know why now, except that our love had cooled down step by step over the years. Maybe because no one could ever see him or herself moving to the other country. The trouble is, now we are not the youngest anymore, so I doubt if I will ever have a playmate again, and I am truly afraid of getting nowhere again in a relationship.

Some people seem to regard their staying power in a LDR as a measurement of their capacity for love. I think it’s very unlikely that one’s preparedness to have little or no physical contact for months or even years is a measurement of one’s "love quotient." Rather, it seems more likely that it’s a measurement of how low one rates one’s chances of attaining a fulfilling in-person relationship.

I’ve personally known several individuals who’ve had largely incorporeal relationship for years (and have experienced this myself). It strikes me as in large part being about playing a romantic game – a game where one can pretend to be experiencing this fine romance that involves constant starving for the other that is never fairly fulfilled (or even partly fulfilled) – but in reality you’re actually avoiding true romance, which requires lots of up-close and private interaction, commitment to making your lives together work, and so forward.

dionne wilson five years ago

so true, its nice at 1st but unless some1 eventually relocates its a dead deal

Got to say this blog is crap. I was in army for 6years with my gf at home in uk me in Germany and we managed 6years and now been out 4years and since then her job takes her away for 3or four months then back for one then away for 3months and were still together. Secret is if u care about each other from the begin and give each other time to live there life’s as they choose but keep in contact when it apart then it works.

I’m in LDR myself, its still early days tho’. We met during the festive season and it was love at very first view. We spent about a month together before he had to leave to another country. We’ve been together for 5months now and haven’t seen him in 4months. Its truly hard I must say, not for the faint-hearted. We talk everyday via Skype, txts and phonecalls even however its expensive. We love each other dearly and not a 2nd passes without me thinking about him.

I love this dude and I truly wanna spend the rest of my life with him. and yes, we’v had pretty heated arguments and its very frustrating. Everyday I wish he was here with me but I need to get used to it since he won’t be moving back for atleast 5years. and by the looks of things we’ll only be able to see each other max 2times a year, as it is very expensive.

Sometimes I ask myself if its truly going to work. but i’m willing to give my all to make it work. I know he loves me and he knows I do too. I trust him with all my heart, he’s an amazing person.

I sob myself to sleep most days because I miss him badly, i’m always hurting. He always comforts me when we talk and it helps only for that time. I can’t wait to be with him and be in his arms again. I look forward to the good times we going to have when we meet again :)))

So all of you who are in LDRs, suspend in there! However, if you feel its not working for you, don’t waste yo time, budge on. All the best to everyone! xoxo

The author of this blog was in a LDR that didn’t work. Evidently.

Finish bull, they can work, it all depends on how faithful you both are to maki g it work, my chick and i have been in a long term for a good while now, I trust her more than i trust my own friends here, we spend every minute of our days with each other. Movie talks don’t count? Like hell they don’t, we spend every minute knowing where each other is, we see each other go to sleep, we see each other go to work and we see each other come back from work. We share our psysical intimate emotions and act them out woth each other frequantly. We basically keep a permanent connectio. Over skype, like literally when shes at work, i see her empyty bedroom and we get the feeling that they are never indeed that far away, it feels like were always close by. Then when they come home, its like how every other duo is like when one comes home from work 🙂

i found this interesting,but not all couples that having long distance relationship cant work out. just right now,my fiancé and i longed for two years and still going strong,you have to learn to trust each other,accept the mistakes,and to stay blessed..everyone knows what’s the best for ourlives..

Wow! This blog has gotten far! It was posted two years ago? Or so. But still heating up!

Anyways, i am too in a ldr and weve been together for one year and half now. The reason why i read this blog is because it catches my attention, just like most of you guys. I cant see anything wrong on what the blogger wrote. We just have to respect her on her opinion. 🙂 if that’s what she belive in, then so be it. But you see, we know what’s going on in our LDRs right? Yes its hard, yes its confusing at times, its a bit frustrating. But i smile while reading this, it makes me proud on my LDR because i know in my heart and in my mind that may boo and i have a strong kind of relationship and does not fall into what the author said. You see, even if i tell you our story and why ldr work for us, you wouldn’t truly get to feel it because you are not in my situation. And its only US who knows the real score inbetween us. 🙂

As for the author! I say, good job! It means your topic is interesting! 🙂

It’s very interesting. I am married, and on my 1rst year of marriage. Since my hubby and I met we were leaving close to each other (just have to cross the street) than I stir to another city, we got married a few months after that now he left our hometown and live in Africa now.

We talk on the phone sometimes, send e-mail, but the feeling of having him around me is fairly different, I haven’t seen him for like six months and he came last Christmas and went back again til now.

This is very hard

Hi, Melissa. You sound like a doll after my own heart. 😉 I love writing as well – especially about relationships.

There are many possible problems in a relationship, as you and others have noted, and long distance undoubtedly adds a degree of difficulty to an already difficult process. However, I think there are worse issues – for example, basic incompatibility, dishonesty, temperament or personality problems.

A key point that others have made is that you should not come in a long-distance relationship casually – which is one reason why it indeed can only work for those looking for a serious relationship – which among other things means that you should be willing in principle to relocate. If you’re not willing to relocate – stop, do not pass LDR Go. 😉

The strengths of a LDR is that if coerces you communicate at length with your fucking partner, and thus to build a relationship in large part on communication. Not being dispersed by physical desire has its pluses and negatives. Positive: it permits to concentrate on getting to know someone deeply without sexual distraction. Negative: it may waste your time by postponing the unpreventable question of whether you feel sexual chemistry or not. You can practice pretty good "phone" or "email" of "skype" chemistry, but that is not the same.

I just emerged from an LDR. We didn’t break up because of long-distance, tho’ that most likely accelerated the process.

Last comment you must be joking

I have been in a long distance relationship for two years now, and we haven’t met at all in this time. we stay in touch through every mean possible, and to be fair this is the best relationship i have been eve. There is trust and whenever we talk we have so much to share and we also send presents and letters to each other to keep the romance going! our relationship is not based on hook-up and physical togetherness, its more spiritual and downright based on communication. We talk everyday and always have so much to say!

I don’t fully agree with the author, obviously they couldn’t build on the LDR. It takes time and a lot of patience to make it work! Especially if you have plans for the future, a little shouldn’t get in the way! If you love each other and trust each other, and are more like friends then a relationship will work, whether its a long distance or CD.

My long(ish) distance relationship has lasted all year, I’m pretty astonished. However, we did have almost a year of witnessing each other every day, all day prior to being one hundred miles away. It wouldn’t be that bad of a distance if we didn’t have class.

What works with ours is that we skype each other, and don’t flake on each other for visits. We alternate visits based on gas money, finals, etc.

Something that I noticed was that the time away from him actually gave me more perspective on how much he meant to me (because I miss the days we spent all day together), and vise versa.

We are only going to different colleges now, but after we graduate it will be no problem to live together again. 🙂

I was once negative about LDRs. I could never understand why people would willingly come in one when there were so many challenges. I certainly never thought I would. Yet I have, and almost by accident.

I met my beau three years ago, when we were living in the same town. We collective two wonderful years together and grew very close. A year ago, circumstances meant I had to budge to the other side of the country. As much as we loved each other, neither of us thought we could cope with a long distance relationship, especially as we were used to being so close. It would be too hard. We determined not to officially break up when I moved, but to permit things to gently drift apart, communicate less and less, leisurely going back to our individual lives.

Did that happen? No. We found that we couldn’t possibly stop talking, skyping, sharing things with each other. And there was no way we could bring ourselves to eventually go our separate ways. We were simply too in love. And now, a year later, I of all people am in a thriving long distance relationship.

And now I have very first forearm practice that LDRs CAN work. Admittedly we were together for two years before mitt, but I’m sure it can be true too for those meet when distance is already an issue. The most significant factor is that you are with the right person, whether in a CD or an LDR. If you trust that person, love sharing your life with them, and receive the same in come back, love will take its own course.

I ready for the worst, and was totally gargled away by the best. True love will ALWAYS find a way :’)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with Long Distance Relationships. I’m in one right now and I couldn’t be more satisfied. People think they don’t work but they do. I know someone who met their gf online and they got married and have a beautiful baby boy. Me and my bf have our arguments but its NORMAL in a relationship. The moving in together is effortless. He wants out of his house and I want him in mine. No matter the distance whether its next door or one thousand five hundred miles apart, you are strapped to have the occasional argument. Happens in every relationship. Whether you get over it or not is the question. I couldn’t be any more satisfied with my life where I stand. My beau is presently sleeping online and the only reason I’m on here is because I just had a conversation with a friend telling me I’m stupid because 99.9% of LDR’s don’t last. So I am doing research. I love my bf and I wouldn’t switch anything in the world. Also hookup is not the key to a healthy relationship. Lovemaking has ruined my past relationships actually. So For Your Information, I’d sooooo rather have an adorable loving conversation with my man than have hookup. Hookup means nothing except hook-up. Unless you are attempting to have a baby there is indeed no need for it. I’d rather cuddle in bed and observe movies than have lovemaking. So for people telling LDR’s are trussed to cheat I say BS! Have the willpower to stay true to your gf/bf and everything will be fine. Don’t let anyone tell you different. With all that said..Time for me to go to sleep with my honey. Goodnight all!

Hi. I’m in this incredible, yet amazing situation. I’m ultimately dating a dear friend with whom we realized we collective mutual feelings unknowingly until after I finalized my divorce. we were both shocked once the talks began but felt comforted and giddy about our fresh dynamic. My former marriage had been over for years unluckily. basically I was cheated on from the commence and there was never a ‘true marriage’. I never legally left for fear of the traditional ‘disrupt’ of family wholeness for our children. I came to embrace my strength of leaving and finding someone for not only myself but also spotted my decision as a wonderful future step for my children as well. It took so long for me to reach this place, and I embrace it now with convenience and enthusiasm. now, amazingly, I feel as if I’ve been given a chance for future love with someone who has always collective my values, and we simply ‘just get each other’. the problem is, our fresh relationship has just begun, just a month and a half prior to his military relocation midway across the US. due to my divorce, it is actually convenience as well as a good omen for my children and i to stir as well. I happen to have such plasticity and timliness to be able to begin a fresh life somewhere else. why should I not stir closer to my fresh bf to give things a chance to grow? i have no intention of cohabitating of course, but i truly feel in my gut that i want us to have a chance to grow. my man has mentioned that he is wary of longdistance relationships and he is so hopeful of lodging down one day soon and beginning his own family. we talked about this many times during our ‘solo friendship’. i don’t want to weigh down our beginning relationship with what could be interpreted as a ‘mighty gesture’ however i don’t want to adolescently end what could grow into a good thing and i have the mobility and convenience to stir near him when he moves. how do i treatment this? i have every intention in doing things ‘traditionally’ bc i want a good man in my life to stay this time around. thank you for reading and i look forward to your responses.

the key is patience some people are just meant to be no matter situations like this

Ive been in a long distance relationship for four months now. i haven’t even met my fiancé, albeit i do know i love him very much and he means everything to me. we communicate by talking on the phone and texting alot. he lives in California and i live in Indiana. he ask me to marry him and i said yes and we plan on living where hes at, albeit i know this is going to be hard on my kids. i have been divorced for over four years now and i have been searching for my soul mate and i know hes the one for me and i love him with all my heart and soul and I know he feels the same way about me. hes suppose to be coming to visit me within the month and im very excited but i also feel ripped, because my daughter doesn’t want to budge there. she is fourteen and has all of her friends here.i have dated several people where i live and i have never felt so much in love as i do with my fiancé. i know most people would think i was crazy, sense we haven’t met, but in my heart i know hes the one for me and i want to be with him and we plan on marrying in about a year. i was very hurt in my divorce and i have made many mistakes dating the wrong boy and i believe god has put us together. i have waited along time to feel blessed again and i feel i deserve to be glad again, but my kids are depressed about moving and my daughter gets very angry when i talk about it, i don’t want to hurt her but im totally in love with my fiancé and i want to be with him, am i doing the right thing by moving? were suppose to stir back to Indiana when his daughter graduates school in about five years. he has joint custody and doesn’t want to leave his daughter that’s why he wants to stay where he is, albeit he feels bad about my situation as well. please give me some advice my daughter is fourteen and is going to be in high school and her friends means alot to her. i attempt to explain to her that she will make fresh friends but she doesn’t want that and menaces me and tells me that she will budge in with her dad and gets very angry at me when i mention moving. am i being selfish to wanting to be glad and stir so far away when i know its upsets her so much. i don’t want to liberate my daughter, but i also don’t want to liberate my fiancé. please if anyone could give me some good advice i would appreciate it greatly. thank you

Im in a long distance relationship iv been with my beau for a while n the past 3months he’s been gone. we’ve only had one fight n it wasn’t a bad one. Yes its very hard not eyeing him I miss him like crazy but trust is a very big part I trust him n he trust me I no he don’t want anyone but me n same goes here if u truly love someone it can be done. Just talk as much as possible. And if u truly love some one distance only maters to the mind not the heart

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I will have to agree with you Op. I guess it won’t be so hard on people who haven’t spent some good time with each other. The woman I recently asked out, we were plane mates for three months. When she moved back to her country, I was truly sad. We kept in touch for fairly a few months once or twice every week. We always have been close friends. Recently after a few days of asking her on a date (she never rejected it and told me that she had expected that this was coming), we had a misunderstanding and had a bad fight. The sad part is that both of us hold on to our anger for fairly some time and we are not talking to each other for some time (however I apologized). I just keep wondering how things which were so good became so ugly. I think this is one thing which makes LDR difficult.

Cathy five years ago from Louisiana, Idaho, Kauai, Nebraska, South Dakota, Missouri

This is an interesting subject to me. After being in a nine year relationship, my bf was transferred to the east coast. It lasted for about two more years and collapsed four days before Christmas. We remain friends because we share a lot of history including losing parents. It’s a healing process. I go from thinking I have the storybook because it was a good relationship and longlasting one. There are so many emotional elements involved with a committed relationship. When it no longer involves the "committed" part, you put on your big female pants so you can hold your chin up and embrace memories that were positive and the valley, well, who likes to cling to the valley? It’s sad and sad and it needs to heal from an unexpected heart earthquake.

I wouldn’t think that long distance relationships are difficult is those people never been actually lived together before. Well i’m telling that because right now i’m having a very hard time because my bf wants to take a job which is very far away from where I am, i can’t go with him because I still need to finish my university. Anyway we had lived together for about four years, but now he determined to go, it gravely is killing me. I truly don’t know what to do. So depressed,

LDR can be very hard. Im kinda in one right now, and things began off wonderful, but each day goes by and I become more sad and frustrated. Ive never met anyone I felt like this for, and at times i feel its hopeless, but at times I feel there is a lot of hope. I do think they can work out if you have the two right kind of people. LDR’s are not for everyone and a lot of trust and dedication is needed. I spend many nights secretly in tears because I just wish I had the money to go see him, even for just a few days. Im just about always in a state of heart ache. But I have faith in my heart that in the end it will work. You just have to have faith and trust and determination. And both sides of the relationship must want the same things, being on the same page. Its understandable why many don’t believe it would work. Its not something everybody can do. Good luck to anyone in a LDR.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Wow, there are some heated comments up in here. Let’s all attempt to be nice, shall we? This is my only hub that makes me want to stop responding to comments. You guys are killing me here!

karthikkash: Thanks for helping me out and responding to these comments! I appreciate you sharing your thoughts in a kind way.

Tman: I’m not truly sure what to say to you. The title is an attention grabber. In the 2nd paragraph, I wrote that I don’t mean to say that LDRs NEVER work. I even bolded it for you. If you can’t read that far down, that’s not my problem. And how dare you compare this article to an article telling suicidal people why they should commit suicide. That’s amazingly offensive, and I’m telling NOTHING of the sort. Yes this article is opinionated. It’s MY OPINION. You don’t have to agree with it. You don’t have to like it. But don’t come on my article and tell me I might as well have been telling suicidal people to kill themselves. I’m not even telling people in LDRs to break up! Where did you get a comparison like that? Lord help me.

Jacko: Man you’re just as bad. Calling people idiots for believing in LDRs is just as mean as the person above who called ME an idiot for writing this article. Everyone’s entitled to their own opinions. I agree with a lot of what you said, but please attempt to be nice when you leave a comment.

Andrew: BE NICE. Your comment isn’t going to help anyone because it was written in a mean tone. You can write the same thing without being mean. HOKAY?

Bullshit 🙂 mine works flawlessly fine, we never argue and we fall in love more deeply every day. He lives on the other side of the planet, which is nine hours flight, and it’s truly expensive to visit eachother, minimum: about Three.000$, but we still make it, cause the love is so true. Im about to turn 17. Now what are you bullshitting about? Mabybe its just you.

Cherrylips1993 five years ago

Thank you so much @karthikkash i indeed appreciate that

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

It truly depends on both of you Cherrylips.. If you both are willing to make it happen, it may work. There will be a lot of difficulties, but if you both are willing to dangle in there, then it may work.

Cherrylips1993 five years ago

hey i truly need help well my bf is about to go into the airforce for four years and i will be completing up college im going to school for nursing i indeed love him and he indeed love me but i truly wanna know if our relationship will work out long distance?

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

cannot say Annie. Don’t assume that he is falling for you. I have a friend who is one of my closest friends. I think about her everyday. Been in touch with her almost every week. We have spent a few weeks traveling together, partying and everything. However, I have never thought of injecting a relationship with her (not that I didn’t find her attractive). I love someone else and still love her tho’ I get enormously pissed off with her sometimes and feel like quitting on her (by the I am not in a relationship, I recently asked her out and it is long distance).

A stud I like has a gf in Portugal and he lives and works here for the past six years, he never mentions her AT ALL, he has worked with me for seven months and today was the very first time he’s mentioned her, he went home in August and not again until xmas, and then went home at the weekend but I mentioned I loved a certain hot chocolate (back in January as a random talk we had) and he has a terrible memory usually but he came in today with a bag of the brand of hot chocolate. now he is very friendly with me and nobody else at work, we talk outside work and his assets language indicates he likes me (mirroring deeds, standing close, smiles and staring for long periods of time while talking, etc) and I like him too. He has said he trusts me, etc. and he tells me a lot about his days off/weekends/etc and then he goes home to see her yet takes the time to think of me whiles he’s there to go out and buy me that!! Is that a LDR failing or what??

PS. Having said that, if I fell in love with someone from a different country, I would attempt an LDR anyway (despite the setbacks). However, one or the other would have to budge nearby – very likely within a year or so.

Evidently, this hub has hit a raw nerve for many of our fellow readers. How interesting. And I wonder why? Here is what I am worried about with regard to long distance relationships: They are a bit like make believe. When LD paramours are together, everything is lovely because they have missed each other and they get to keep experiencing the honeymoon. When they are not together, they get to imagine everything is lovely, primarily due to not having been around to see the other person’s indeed annoying habits. In day to day, same city relationships, we get the real deal – the good, the bad, and the ugly. I’d rather have that. That way, I know who I’m indeed dealing with. and I can determine just how worthwhile he is.(By the way, 78% of boys will not admit to cheating.) I loved your post very much and I agree with you. There are exceptions to everything, but I suspect they are infrequent indeed.

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

However I agree that LDRs are enormously difficult, I won’t agree on the part of cheating. Cheating is very subjective to the person. Only a person totally messed up in the brain would cheat. If you say that a "breakup is imminent", I would be more inclined to agree, however I would not totally.

I have a very close friend who is in a relationship for the past eight years. Her bf is working in a different country. They see each other once in six months. She once told me that tho’ she suspends out with a lot of guys, it has never ever crossed her mind to either cheat or breakup with her beau. I know her bf and I for one, know that he is never going to cheat on her nor breakup with her. Having said that, she tells me that it does hurt a lot not witnessing for so long. They talk to each other very regularly.

So yes, LDR can be very painful, but can workout if both are willing to sacrifice certain things.

Yeah Jacko’s right. Its laughable to see people right that they have met online and are waiting to meet up. That they talk via phone and that they are in love more than ever. Idiots! You cant love someone you’ve never met in person, you purely passion for them because its a challenge them being so far away and you cant wait to meet this person who "is amazing" as soon as you do, all that build up will be gone, and the challenge over. That’s not love you fools. Go and get some ball-sac and meet someone (a real person, not words on a screen) and learn what real love is! It takes time with a person. And other fools who right that they trust someone they met overseas on a holiday, and cant see them much. Well hello, you fell for the dude who was hot and nice on holidays, who tells you hes so into you and you say the same. Hold out for someone you’ve met and gotten to know. I bet had you actually had a real face to face relationship, you would realise they have flaws and they arent just awesome. But your holding out for them because you think things will be fine, like they were when you met, forever. Christ its called the honeymoon phase, except this completes and you learn to love your playmate for their flaws and their pros. You cant love someone you met for a week and haven’t seen in months. Get over it and stop wasting time

And to those of you who think ive got no clue and am opinionated, ive been with my gf for four and a half yrs. She moved five hrs away a few months ago for uni, we still make sure we see each other once a week. And even that is difficult. All the love for her i have, i can not ensure we will be together in a year. If she was here with me i could ensure that. We trust each other totally, are best friends, but if we witnessed each other any less, it wouldn’t work. Im a realist

This article is right. You people are idiots who disagree. Up top Karringtyn wrote telling shes in the best relationship shes ever been in. Hmmm sorry to say but watching someone once every six weeks is ridiculous, if that’s built the best relationship you’ve ever been in then that’s sad. And others who say it gives you a chance to "not take them for granted" to "concentrate more on communication and not hookup" um hello but hook-up is one of the most significant factors in a good relationship. As is trust. If you have trust in someone but don’t have lovemaking, they might as well be your friend. If you don’t have good hookup, you arent going to be pleased, every person has needs, and when you lack good quality hook-up your relationship will end. No one remains pleased in a relationship where the hookup deep throats. Long distance relationship means no loving, or little loving. Hence why when those needs are not met, people tend to cheat. You can trust your playmate 100%, but if you don’t see them enough, you cant be physical and a good relationship needs physical and mental love. A long distance relationship can work if you still see each other in person at least a duo times a month, but even then that’s going to make it hard. Quality time together is what makes you compatable, not computer talk or movie talk. So stop kidding yourselves, if you want to make distance work, go and see your fucking partner more then once every six weeks! You both deserve that, and if you don’t and honestly think they arent going to stray, good luck thinking that long term. Once every six weeks is not a relationship pfft

Lol, you say "I merely wrote this to showcase why LDR are hard". I’m sorry..is that why your title reads "Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships NEVER Work". Did you leave behind the "never" 😉 it’s okay, I forgive you for your ignorance. As far as your article, most times I would say "I respect your opinion, but disagree" everything you’ve mentioned is bias and opinionated. You basically put something out here that couokd potentionally harm than do good. You might as well have told suicidal people "Five Reasons Why You Should Pull The Trigger". I think this article is enormously bias coming from a person who seems to know a little bit about LDR but yet has never been in one or exepericenced it through another..per se. Friend, etc. I guess I could go off and tell gay people "Five Reasons Why You’re Not Normal". No, I don’t know you, but lady I know enough from reading this to get an idea 🙂 speak I’ll of it if you wish. I don’t care about you. But just know your stuff and gather facts before you make bold claims such as the ones I came across here today 🙂 thank you for your time it was very "insightful". I learned how bias people are about topics they know nothing of..what’s that called..ignorance 🙂

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

All the best for that Skinny 🙂 I can related to the exact screenplay. I was in touch with that special one through skype, facebook and phone. But then I found one thing that however I dreamed to take it further, there would be too many practical issues which had to be treated apart from the distance. I had certain ambitions and I found that the LDR I was contemplating was indeed not worth it when compared to them. So I eventually had to drop the plan. I would choose a relationship with someone living in my own country however far she is. At least, it will be lighter to travel and meet each other.

(cntinue). But now she had to went back to her country because she finished her employment contract. therefore we are now a ldr.. its been four months since october 2011.. I’ve never been in a ldr before. We maintain contacting each other via phone, skype, facebook and etc. Hope we work it out this relationship..

My gf and i have been together for two years. she lives miles from my place. I came to know her because she is working in my country.. we get along fair enough. ups and downs

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Marisa: Sorry that you’re going through a harsh time. Time will tell if your love will prevail.

Julie Thomson: I understand your point, but relationships are about more than trust. Yes, trust undoubtedly helps with the very first few points I made. But there are problems that can arise in a LDR that aren’t present if you date someone near you (like the moving problem). Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

MR: What you wrote is a good example of a problem that an LDR may practice that doesn’t involve trust (i.e. what I wrote to Julie above). I can’t even imagine eyeing your significant other only once or twice a year. That’s truly hard! Hope things work out for you.

Vinaya Ghimire: Glad to help!

Samantha: (i’m using caps for emphasis, I promise I’m not internet yelling at anyone.) FOR THE RECORD, I HAVE NEVER BEEN IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP. I wrote this article from an observational point of view, which I know is hard for some people to believe because most people only write about what they’ve personally experienced. This article doesn’t have any of my private practice in it. Anyway Samantha, I honestly wouldn’t consider three hrs apart to be a LDR. Sure that’s a little bit long to travel to see each other. but that’s a distance you can drive. It’s nothing compared to someone who has to fly to see their significant other. I’m glad that your relationship has worked out, but yes the point of this article is to be biased. It’s about why LDRs are difficult. Hence the title.

rungirlsl: Thanks for commenting! I love the comments on here that aren’t just yelling at me for telling something bad about LDRs.

Mr J: UK to Australia?! I’d say you CERTAINLY win the LDR badge. You may pick it up at the next window. 🙂

I feel sick because my gf moved 9hrs drive away and I know that all of the above is true, it’s been a year now and its leisurely getting more and more frustrating for me.

I hate it, I hate the unavoidable thought of a break up because it took me nineteen years to find someone like her, I don’t want to wait another nineteen 🙁

Im in my very first LDR right now, i met the boy when i was on holiday over summer, in August, it was love at very first view as we intantly fell for each other. The thing is we spent ONE day together and im youthfull, im eighteen and hes 17. We have been doing this relationship for six months now, i feel more connected to him than ever, i indeed indeed feel something, i don’t know how to explain it and i don’t know if its love, still to this day i get butterflies when we talk over the phone. My parents tell me that im to youthfull to know what love is but this feeling for him is so strong, i mean i have not been tempted once to cheat and its weird because before i left for that holiday i was the most boy crazy teeneger anyone could ever meet, now when im with my friends and they see a ‘hot’ stud i don’t know i just get an pic of my bf and im just like yeah guys, MY Beau IS HOT. I’m truly glad because this way i know for sure im not being used because theres no hook-up involved, we talk 24/7, when hes at a party he calls me so that im ‘ther with him’. Im not gonna get to see him until June, its Truly hard however im not gonna lie and im not speaking about trust because i trust him 100%, the only hard thing is missing him, especially when im at work and i see couples everywhere, but im staying strong cause i have this feeling inwards that this is right. I talk to his sisters (who iv never met before) over the phone, facebook, skype and they too believe that we are doing the right thing and asure me they have him on check lol, Im going to University next year in the city he’s in, i hope that it does work out and i want to thank all the people who collective their positive stories of LDR, i feel very motivated now. Thanks

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I have never been in a long distance relationship. However, since I have a duo of closest friends in other countries, it holds true with that. In fact at one point of time, I had contemplated a long distance relationship. I liked that person so much but eventually had to drop it since we both were in different countries. However I knew that she liked me, it was pretty evident that it was not an effortless task for either of us to stir to the other’s country.

I think I win the long distance relationship badge, I live in the UK, she lives in Australia! A long five months ahead!

chriszones2012 five years ago

LDR aint that baad. lemme tellya m in an LDR with mah gurl for the past five years i met her on a blind date in december two thousand six online and m still with her we’ve met 6-7 times in these five years. me loves her nd she loves me . but i dnt call it love ITS SOMETHING MORE THAN LOVE .

I AGREE Fervor AND ROMANCE ADDS TASTE TO LIFE BUT WAT IS NUTRITIOUS IS THE MATURITY AND UNDERSTANDING, AND I THINK IVE HAD ONE WITH HER. ONLY THING LEFT IS TO TASTE IT WHICH WE KNOW WE WILL SOON :). AND HAVING SOMEBODY AFTER INQUISITIVELY WAITING FOR YEARS MAKES IT EVEN TASTIER. THAN EATING SOMETHING TASTY DAILY .

I HOPE Y’ALL GET IT

Long distance relationships DO NOT work unless one of the parties involved is, or is planning on relocating. And, I must point out, most of the posters on here who claim success have only been in a long distant ‘relationship’ for an average of two years, which is not a long time at all. I would be wooed if couples were together for five or more years, but that doesn’t seem the case. Trust me on this; if your significant other runs into someone who lives closer to them, and they’re attracted to them, they’re going to bolt from you to be with someone who’s a little more convenient. And, you can’t blame him/her either.

I had this LDR’S with spanish boy and i were in England.and its failed.lots of promisess he made, and he even asked for money and i did sent him a money.how stupid i’m.and now i fall in love again with a stud who is in australia.i was afraid to fall in love again as i truly don’t wanna get hurt.and he made me fall in love so madly and i truly want to be with him for the rest of life.we are just about to meet next week,but seem his love is fading.its hurts me so much again and i indeed don’t want this relationship failed.

Why do I feel like this blog was written by someone who has never truly gone through an LDR before, with their entire heart in it? I am in an LDR, three hours apart, met online, and he is the best man I have ever known. We plan to be married, and I can say that I am so grateful for him, and this LDR has permitted me to rely on communication and openess in a way I have never even experienced in my past CD relationships. This blog is biased.

Vinaya Ghimire five years ago from Nepal

I don’t believe in long distance relationship, but I never thought about the reasons. Thanks for sharing.

You do bring up some interesting points, I find Ldr’s to be difficult, they can work but the Difference to people commenting in here and mine is the fact that my gf and I were together for six months in Canada, her visa expired and she had to go Back to Russia and now we’ve been apart for three months with a hopefully coming back in a month for a month then she’s off to the states to pursue musical aspirations, fortunately we both are musicians but she wishes not to live in Canada but see me maybe one or twice a year. I find it very hard to be in a relationship with someone who only has enough drive to see you once or twice a year and doesn’t want to live in your country.

Julie Thomson five years ago from Connecticut

My hubby and I were LDR for three years while I was in college (me WA, him CT). I can see where some of the points you made might be legitimate but it seems more likely that you were burned by an LDR to me. I stiffly believe that you have to trust the other person, and that means not having to check up on the other person, no matter how far away they are. If you can’t trust your significant other than why does it matter how close they are? Again, I can see some of the points your making but this seems more like something meant for someone with trust issues. All of this can be just as lightly applied to someone living close, as if to say "people will stay in close distance relationships longer because it’s lighter." It almost isn’t fair to say without a legitimate explore to back it up.

I am presently in a long distance relationship and it’s just two cities away and everything this article stated is something I went through or am going through its difficult and I still do ask myself is the love strong enough to keep us together or is the trust issues stronger to just keep pulling us apart?

He doesn’t understand all of my frustration because he has way more patience but it frustrates me to the point where I am always so mad at him. I don’t know what to do.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

JustKeepSmiling: Your question is a hugely complicated one to response. It’s one of those topics that people could write books about. Do you begin preparing yourself for an oncoming heartbreak before it happens or give your all in your relationship while it’s going well? I don’t think there is a right response. I think it’s whatever you want to do, whatever you feel more comfy with, whatever your heart is telling you is right. But you know what? I’m more apt to say give your all. If you’ve determined to proceed being in this relationship for now, that’s what you should do: Be in the relationship. I’ve learned that attempting to prepare yourself for bad things to happen NEVER works. the bad things end up hurting way more than you could even imagine, even with your preparing. So live your life for today. Appreciate what’s happening in the now. None of us are assured tomorrow, so love your relationship as it is presently. Leave the heartbreak for when it actually happens (if it does). Best of luck to you.

JustKeepSmiling five years ago

My current beau and I have been dating for two years, and our relationship has pretty much been rock solid. I go to boarding school in the UK and he goes to boarding school in the states, and we both live in Hong Kong. (I know, I know, we’re youthfull! but I think two years is proof that this isn’t some kind of puppy-dog love/fling, right?) We usually get to see each other a few times during Christmas and a few times during the summer. There were slight ups and downs but overall it’s been amazing.

Last night was his last night before he had to leave again, and he abruptly asked me, "Am I worth it?" I asked him what he was talking about, and he told me that it would be at least seven years before he could come back home to live here permanently, and that it was impractical for us to have to miss out on so much on life because we’d sacrifice going on holidays with family/friends and stuff just to see each other. The thing is, it wouldn’t be such a big problem if it weren’t for the fact that he’s embarking university coming september and. well, we all know what american university (colleges?) can be like when it comes to partying and drinking etc. It’s a totally different lifestyle, and we’ll very likely get to see each other even less than we do now.

I asked him whether I was worth it, and he paused and said, "I don’t know." I know he loves me, and he told me that one of the reasons he wants to break up is because he doesn’t want to hold me back, and that he knows there are people out there who are better for me because of the shorter distance. After some discussion, we agreed that we’d attempt for another year (until next christmas, three months after he starts uni/college) and then see whether it still works. My problem now is. Do I embark distancing myself to prepare myself for the potential breakup, which could increase the risk of violating up, or do I give it my all and throw myself into it etc but then be doubly crushed if it doesn’t work out anyway?

I suppose you might say that I’m youthful, and I might get over it, and that I’m not even an adult yet etc, but love is still love, and agony is still ache. Heartbreak is still heartbreak, and. I just don’t indeed know what to do.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Missing him: Honestly, it’s up to you whether you contact him or not. I don’t see any real harm in you contacting him again, from what you wrote (unless you’re wanting him to commit to something he’s not ready to commit to). It sounds like you hit a typical LDR problem and the distance got to be too much. Maybe you could attempt being friends and see how that goes. good luck to you.

I have to disagree with your reasons. Long distance relationships can work if both people are on the same page and believe in each other. My fiancé left in two thousand nine to work overseas and has been gone ever since, and our love is stronger now then it was the day he left. If its meant to be its meant to be

I certainly disagree with this !! Ldr aren’t negative .. Let’s just say if it’s meant to be it’ll be !!

I was in a LDR with my ex of one year. We met last Christmas, and we hit it off truly quick. But I had to budge back to my home country two months into the relationship. But my ex called n texted almost everyday so we were fine, but then I didn’t have a job then, so we had all the time to talk. I went back to his city three months later, his families and friends like me a lot. I stayed at his city for one month then I went back to my home country. Things began to fall off when I embark my job since we had less time to talk. So in one incident, we fought over the texting thing, and he asked I I dreamed a break from us, I asked him for his opinion, he said that this long distance thing is getting raunchy on us. So I asked if he wanna call time on it, he said it might be time to take a time out of it. I replied ok. Later he texted telling I was being more than patient, understandable n reasonable. The next day I texted him " thank you for the good times and sorry for the bad, I wish things were different, and that I wish him happeness". He replied" hey, there were no bad times, I am sorry for being distant, I haven’t learnt to let work go, I don’t wanna give u false hope, I am who I am. Switch possible but slender. I have serious commitment issues, which are not healthy for relationships." I replied" wish u success at work, bye" He replied" wish things were different too.. Take care. Keep smiling" I miss him a lot. Don’t know if I should contact him again. I know I like him n he does the same. I kinda want to get back with him, don’t know if he feels the same. I know he isn’t ready to commit to marriage. And he said he is holding me back. I miss him, Should I contact him?? Help !!

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Josephine Falnor: I’m glad that your relationship works well. However, your one positive practice doesn’t negate the fact that sometimes LDRs are harsh. And sometimes they don’t work. I wrote this article to merely point out the reasons why they’re hard. Thanks for your comment.

Dave: Yes, it does depend a lot on the people involved. Everyone has different practices in life, and no two people are the same.

John: Thank you for taking the time to share your story about how hard LDRs can be. Your story touches on some of the points I attempted to make in this article, so it’s nice to see a real example on here.

caramelsky: Superb story. And you brought up a good point about having a plan to stir/budge in together. this is the best way to ensure that a LDR survives the distance. Thanks for commenting.

I also agree that this article annoyed me. I’ve been in a long distance relationship for Two.Five years. Never once thought about cheating nor has my fiancé and we talk all day everyday until he goes to work.

We have a better relationship than anyone other duo we know that are actually together.

If there is trust then you have nothing to worry about and skype movie calling makes it lighter.

i don’t know what to do

caramelsky five years ago from the Central Coast

You bring up a lot of interesting points in this article, and a lot of them are true. I’ve been in a LDR for about a year now, and I feel more connected to my mate than I ever did with any CDR’s I’ve been in. He lives about five hours away and twenty minutes from some family I have up north whom I visit often. The only problem is we’re four years apart, and I’m too youthfull yet. I’m looking forward to being able to budge out soon.

Our relationship is mostly based on trust, communication, and personality. I’ve only seen him around ten times over this year, and yes it can be hard, and yes I miss him sometimes. but I believe it’s beyond worth the puny wait when you meet someone so special. That one or two years waiting isn’t anything compared to the life you could spend with each other later once you officially got together. I plan on moving up there after school to attend a community college while he joins the Air Force.

It takes a fine deal of strength and patience (I’m not the best at either of those, haha). but remembering that something and someone so special is waiting for me makes it lighter to bear the space inbetween us.

Wonderful article however, and fine view points. Even with all the bad things that could happen, there are always the long distance relationships that do work. They just take two loyal and faithful people who are willing to wait for each other.

I met a woman online about a year and a half ago. she is from Spain and I am from Fresh Zealand. After talking for about a year I flew over to see her and stayed with her for a month. I guess in this time we truly fell for one another even however it was a brief period of time. we said that we were in love with each other after I guess three weeks but we had been communicating for a year, and I truly did fall in love with her. anyway I flew back to NZ about six months ago and I haven’t seen her since and in this time we talk on the net but she is a uni student and cannot afford to fly here to meet me so I have been saving to pay for her. well to cut a long story brief (women your gonna hate me) a few weeks ago I went out on the town and got truly tipsy with some friends and when I was in a indeed drunken state of most likely not being able to communicate to a five year old child I fell into the temptation of another woman, which my assets has been longing for so long like an earth pounding strike inwards me and regretfully I slept with her. When I woke up in the morning I felt like throwing up (and it wasn’t the hangover). I didn’t even know her name and she didn’t know mine.. I asked her what happened last night and she said we were buzzed and she was on the rebound. I didn’t know what to do so I called her a cab and sent her home.. I didn’t even ask for her name because I didn’t want to know and I will never see her again in my life. This happened about two weeks ago and in the meantime I have booked a ticket for the lady who I am in a long distance relationship with to fly over to see me from Spain. When we talk on skype now I feel a sick feeling in my belly and I look at my face in the little window with discust and can’t believe how I could do that to her. I have indeed began to hate myself and develop depression. I don’t know if I should tell her because I know it would break her heart, and we would have no chance of being together.. but all my friends who I told it about are telling me that I am not even in a decent relationship so just tell myself it was a mistake and never do it again.. just stir on and leave it in the past where it belongs. So that is what I am attempting to do now but the bad feeling wont go away. I have no idea why I did it.. I know drinking is no excuse. I guess I just needed to pack something that was missing in my life that my figure was longing. Anyway that is my story and I will tell everyone now that Long distance relationships are freakin hard. I don’t go to nightclubs anymore because I am not exactly an ugly man and woman are always attempting to flirt with me. I know she will never find out..but I HATE to keep secrets from her I am her very first love and she is so beautiful and unspoiled. to make it worse I was thinking of proposing to her when she arrived but now I cannot bring myself to do it. I think I will wait at least another six months and then see. My advice for guys in LDR’s is don’t ever let yourself get into a vulnerable position especially if you are drinking and have not seen your LDR gf for ages.. If you are missing the touch of a woman stay away from nightclubs or anywhere that involves alcohol!

Suffice to say it depends on the people involved.

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work, PairedLife

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work

Never is a harsh word. But it’s lighter to say than "More often than not, these relationships don’t work out" or "In most cases, they usually don’t work out." So what I indeed mean is: Here are some reasons why you should think twice before embarking a long distance relationship. Because they, more often than not, in most cases, don’t work out.

1) It’s Hard to Trust Someone You Hardly See in Person

When it comes to trust, talk is cheap. Anybody can say they’re trustworthy. Anyone can say they love you. But you need to see it to believe it. Real genuine trust is shown in a person’s deeds, not just words. In long distance relationships, you see each other so infrequently that it’s rough to build up that trust. You visit each other, then go back to your separate lives, without a clue what the other person is doing while you’re away for the next five weeks. How are you supposed to build long lasting trust?

Two) It Usually Leads to Cheating

Unlike cheating when your significant other lives down the block, cheating in long distance relationships is slightly understandable. [However by a very meager percent. Cheating is terrible, and I very suggest not doing it to anyone.] You can’t see your significant other whenever you want, unlike in most relationships, and you’re only human. Most people would only be able to hold out for so long before the arms of somebody way more convenient (and local) embark looking real good. If you’re one of the good ones, you’ll end your long distance relationship before it comes to the cheating stage. But it’s effortless to be tempted if you’re thinking there’s no way your significant other will find out about your straying.

Three) Distance Leads to Frustration. Frustration Leads to Fighting. Fighting Leads to Break Ups. It’s the Unpreventable Cycle of Long Distance Relationships.

Nobody thinks about the distance in their relationship and goes, HOORAY! This is so much joy! It’s frustrating, for everyone. You’re beginning off your relationship at a point of frustration. Yes, frustration leads to fighting, which leads to breakups in general, but you’re beginning your relationship with frustration. Most relationships embark off at a neutral point. If things get bad later, it’s because differences and incompatibilities build up, creating a frustrating situation. With long distance relationships, the frustration is built right into the fabric.

Four) These Relationships Go on Way Longer Than They Should.

In brief distance relationships (nobody calls them that, but just go with it), when things embark getting truly bad, a break up usually happens shortly after. [A lot of brief distance relationships also go on way longer than they should. People haul relationships out in general.] But the reason why long distance relationships almost ALWAYS go on longer than they should is because of the distance.

Five) You’ll Never Have a Future Unless You Live in the Same Place.

It’s pretty hard to commence a family when you live in different states. This is visible, but it seems to be something a lot of long distance-ers don’t truly think about until the relationship isn’t going so well. You get frustrated by the distance and then it’s "You need to budge here or this isn’t going to work." Well, that was always true. even when you were thinking about embarking the relationship. In order to have a real future with someone, you have to live in the same place. Relationships are hard enough. Commencing a relationship off without even having that plain requirement met makes it a zillion times tighter.

If you indeed want a long distance relationship to work, it’s best to have a plan to end the distance soon. Don’t make relationships stiffer than they have to be, for blubbering out noisy. Life is hard enough. Think twice before you bring a situation into your life that’s going to make life even tighter for you. The person better be "the one," with bells and whistles and singing birds, to be worth all that effort. Otherwise, take a stroll down to the local watering crevice and find a date there instead.В

Your turn: What was it that made your long distance relationship end? Or, what has made your long distance relationship work?В

God Centered Long Distance Relationships

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by Jennifer Gonzales 0

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by princesswithapen 0

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Comments

As a matter of fact I as an old tradition thought have to agree with the fact that the most normal, from natures point of view too relationship is the one where the fucking partners are close to each other. However nowadays a lot of people including me have switch this idea making it possible to accomplish long distance relationship and made it possible enough to take place into the real world and not in the fantasy world as you wish to call it my dear. it is indeed hard for an Internet relationship to work out some of the time but not most of them. We neither know whether or not the possibilities of making one LDR are less than the ones of a cdr. And let’s be entirely fair here it is also a fact that cdrs don’t always work out as imagined or planned by both or one of the fucking partners. According to your article my dear I can see that most of the things lack evidence during to the unknown number of successes by the relationships that embarked from a ld. Yes life is hard and the real world is harsh, but letc not also leave behind that this real world that most of the people wish to call can be affected by many parts like politics and economics. there are people out there who did things out of imagination such as flying to the moon creating clone humans, inventing robots, finding cures for deadly viruses and turning the unlikely into possible, so if you think for a moment if we compare all those which might seem kinda of unrelated but if you compare all those you can say that making an LDR is not indeed that unlikely

I had a long distance romantic correspondence with very occasional meetings. As warned above, it kept going years too long even after I was "committed" to being with someone else. I put many romanticized feelings on the person who was far away but I never knew the real person behind the messages. You may feel that you indeed know, or even love, the other person but for me it was my own imagination that made the distant paramour seem ideal. Be careful.

If you begin to love someone who is near you while you secretly attempt to keep your ldr, its a mistake. Ask yourself honestly about whether you indeed just love what your imagination lets you see. If that may be the case, cut off your ldr and take the time to know whether you are blessed with what you do have. If you are coaxed you truly want the ldr, then you get yourself near that person to see if it works in the skin. Don’t delay.

This is a geyser of crap. LD CD whatever love is love. I never intended to fall in love with someone in Australia. Living in the US makes that about as LD as you can get. However, the best part of this relationship is indeed what I just said. I absolutely never intended to fall all in love with someone eight thousand miles away from me. But it happened and I’d be a loser not to work my bootie off to make this work until one of us moves. You may only be blessed with true love once. If it’s real it will work!

th0ught two years ago from Central Fresh York

They certainly are difficult, but as I mentioned in my hub, not unlikely. 🙂

My spouse and I did the entire long distance thing for about one and a half years before we got married. I lived in the States and he I’m Europe. Yes the distance was hard and there were very many days where I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore. But what made it all worth it was the skill that the day was coming when he and I would never have to be separated by distance again.

I met a man nine months ago and when we met he did tell me that a stir was in the pipeline due to a very profitable business promotion. Of course at the time I did not give it too much thought as we did not realise at that stage that we would fall in love with each other. He relocated two months ago and it’s been simply awful. When he comes to me or if I go to him we still don’t get quality time together as he is always busy with work, clients etc. crimson flags did pop up primarily eg I have two petite Pekingese dogs that he is not too keen on, he is addicted to the TV. Now however they have become big issues. I think we broke up via text messaging last night, but I’m not even sure of that. Lol.

If your man is a good communicator maybe it is lighter, but in my case it is truly an aweful practice. We may have not worked out anyway but the agony is being opened up now.

Pardon me for telling this but the above article if i may call it an article is a loosely written lump with absolutely no reference to what practice these alcoholic ramblings of the author originate from. I have never read a more one sided argument in any subject whatsoever. And to go to the extent of telling that cheating is understandable? It is ABSOLUTELY NOT..So am i to believe that you are ok with your beau sleeping with another woman or your gf sleeping around with other guys while on a business journey or out of town simply because he/ she is lonely and depressed?. Cheating represents the betrayal of emotions and can be as plain as an ”guiltless lie” said to ”protect” the other or can go as far as sleeping with another person.Both are amazingly wrong and exceedingly stupid. I hope this isn’t the way you indeed feel about LDRs and i Indeed hope you just posted this chunk as a dare from your friends to write something funny.

I married my long distance relationship this year. It was slightly different because he was in the army but the trust thing was hard because of a woman he’d been with. When he went home for Christmas she posted geysers of pics of her hugging him and they even stayed in the same hotel room! I have to say, me and him did see eachother every two weeks however because we were both in Europe even however one thousand miles apart.

Grace-Wolf-30 four years ago from England

The kid in class who does the extra hard question just for joy turns out to be a mathematical genius, with a indeed fine job, and the person who wakes up at 4am every morning to go for a sixteen mile jog, regardless of the weather, has a healthy heart, fantastic lung capacity, and a tranquil mind. Every relationship is unique, and should be treated so. You know in your heart what is right and what is wrong for you. Nothing worth having comes effortless.

lifeintheworld four years ago from The World

Meh. I was in a long distance relationship for three years. Ended up moving to the same country, still together today. If the people are worth it and put in the effort, it will work.

My bf and i were together in the same place for ten moths before we had to get into a long distance relationship to accommodate our studies. Its two years now and we have two more years to end this distance. All i would like to say here is that it doesn’t matter if its long distance or not. its all about who you are with and how loyal you both are to each other. i love him alot and i know he loves me the same. And our relationship is so beautiful till we sometimes leave behind that we are in a LDR. It only hurts when you cant hold each other and hug each other.

I could write about how my bf and I have been making it through with a entire ocean separating us – or you could just read about it here: http://surviving-thedistance.blogspot.co.at/

Everyone who is telling they are in a long distance relationship fail to mentinon who is moving? so you’re in one. and? eventually someone has to stir. And for those who’s LDR worked. did you budge? there is no way its going to work because resentment will commence to build up..You will want that person here with you through the good times and especially the bad.

My beau and I have been together for almost two years. About three months ago, he moved seven hours away from me for schooling. So I do agree with this article in that our frustrations lead to lots of fighting. Long distance is difficult, very difficult at least for me. We facetime twice a week. He isn’t very comfy with me going out on the weekends. I’m also not comfy with going out on the weekends.

But this past weekend, I did something horrible. I went to a concert and drank so much alcohol. After eight or nine shots, I was making out with a fellow who came with me and my girlfriends. I ended up telling this fellow that I find him indeed attractive and that him and I would be good together as a duo.

Unluckily, it didn’t end there. Since then we’ve been texting each other. He came to visit me last night at my workplace, and we ended up smooching each other and making out.

I no vanessajoie! It’s very lonely and your rite it is like a marathon! Only thing to do is to keep busy I find. Skype is good however we talk on it almost every night talk about our day to each other.

my SO and i met last two thousand eight and had a hurricane romance, we were separated by distance after six months because he went to the states and im left here in the Philippines (imagine the miles apart) we stayed in touch and after a year he came back but was only able to stay for less than two weeks, again we didn’t see each other for two years but the love and communication is still there. last april two thousand twelve he came to see me again for three weeks. He’s now back in the states and wont be able to see him again for two years.We’ve had marriage talks so we can be together ultimately but something makes the situation complicated everytime.he loves me and i do too. earnestly, i feel like a marathon runner that’s almost reachin the end of race only to be told that they have moved the finish line further. . :(( we’ll be celebrating our 4yr anniversary this september and four years in a row that we have had never celebrated it together. Im still holding on and he does too but i admit im hurting that i cant be with him as often as i want too. Its gettin so lonely for me now.

Looks like my entire marriage, which embarked with observing him for the very first time in person at our 7th "monthsary" then the 2nd time after our very first anniversary, is a lie then.

It is the most difficult thing to ever practice, but I believe that if you do truly love someone, then it is possible to make it work up to a point. As human, we all need physical companionship and can only go so long without it. So you are right to say that they don’t -usually- work out, but they certainly may if you indeed work at it and want it. As pointed out before, long distance relationships should be a means to an end that results in you actually being together. Not a permanent factor in your ‘relationship’

dashingscorpio five years ago

You made some excellent points. #Five most likely is the truest of them all. The best relationships are inbetween people who actually spend time together! I’ve known people in LDRs who claim they have been together for a year. However they are confusing "calendar time" with actual time. If you only see someone one weekend a month then out of twelve months you have seen them twenty four days out of three hundred sixty five day year!

LDRs were meant to be improvised. At some point for things to last someone has to determine to budge!

Interesting hub! I think what’s significant to reminisce however is that a lot of long-distance relationships don’t commence out that way, they do embark when you’re living in the same place or relatively close by, it’s just that life might haul you apart. In this case, I truly have to disagree with the very first two points you made. It’s not hard to trust someone you love, and if it is then you most likely shouldn’t be with them in the very first place. And if you truly love someone, then you won’t even think about cheating on them.

Silas Kessler five years ago

Honestly, this article has no concrete backbone to support itself on. It makes it seem like EVERY person in a LDR is gonna cheat, lie, fight, etc. People are people, and we all have different ways of coping with things. I am presently in a LDR with a damsel in South Korea, and I’m in the US. I’m Nineteen, and have never had a relationship. (Brief or Long distance!) I’ve had many, many chances, but I’m just picky. This doll on the other mitt is special. She is so different than any other female I’ve met, so i very doubt I’ll get sick of her, and go to the "watering fuckhole" to find some cheap biotch, because I wouldn’t let my chick go for anything. Distance is nothing, and the day we meet will be like nothing else. We will relish every 2nd together, rather than take it all for granted.

Hi! I have been in a long distance relationship for Feb 2010. We embarked talking on Facebook and then Sype and then I ultimately went to meet him while he was back packing round the Far East in the May. We where madly in love!

My Mum had a stroke one and a half years ago. My only sister died nine years ago and my Dad.I had aunts and uncles die in the last few years too! I just feel life is to brief what should I do?

Feel like I’m in a no win situation!

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

I think Lawrence pretty much has all these comments covered. Thanks for looking out, friend.

Lol, glad to be in the minority then.

England-Australia long distance. In a relationship for coming up to four years now, applying for permanent residence with my fucking partner as a sponsor in Australia on Monday.

Feels good to be awesome.

A indeed good blog. So true what Lawrence says, and also so much true in all comments.

I have been a LDR over three thousand kilometers for Ten. years, but now it seems we are violating up. He wrote a mail telling he needs a break, and I do not indeed know why now, except that our love had cooled down little by little over the years. Maybe because no one could ever see him or herself moving to the other country. The trouble is, now we are not the youngest anymore, so I doubt if I will ever have a playmate again, and I am indeed afraid of getting nowhere again in a relationship.

Some people seem to regard their staying power in a LDR as a measurement of their capacity for love. I think it’s very unlikely that one’s readiness to have little or no physical contact for months or even years is a measurement of one’s "love quotient." Rather, it seems more likely that it’s a measurement of how low one rates one’s chances of attaining a fulfilling in-person relationship.

I’ve personally known several individuals who’ve had largely incorporeal relationship for years (and have experienced this myself). It strikes me as in large part being about playing a romantic game – a game where one can pretend to be experiencing this good romance that involves constant starving for the other that is never fairly fulfilled (or even partly fulfilled) – but in reality you’re actually avoiding true romance, which requires lots of up-close and private interaction, commitment to making your lives together work, and so forward.

dionne wilson five years ago

so true, its nice at 1st but unless some1 eventually relocates its a dead deal

Got to say this blog is crap. I was in army for 6years with my gf at home in uk me in Germany and we managed 6years and now been out 4years and since then her job takes her away for 3or four months then back for one then away for 3months and were still together. Secret is if u care about each other from the commence and give each other time to live there life’s as they choose but keep in contact when it apart then it works.

I’m in LDR myself, its still early days however. We met during the festive season and it was love at very first glance. We spent about a month together before he had to leave to another country. We’ve been together for 5months now and haven’t seen him in 4months. Its indeed hard I must say, not for the faint-hearted. We talk everyday via Skype, txts and phonecalls even tho’ its expensive. We love each other dearly and not a 2nd passes without me thinking about him.

I love this dude and I indeed wanna spend the rest of my life with him. and yes, we’v had pretty heated arguments and its very frustrating. Everyday I wish he was here with me but I need to get used to it since he won’t be moving back for atleast 5years. and by the looks of things we’ll only be able to see each other max 2times a year, as it is very expensive.

Sometimes I ask myself if its indeed going to work. but i’m willing to give my all to make it work. I know he loves me and he knows I do too. I trust him with all my heart, he’s an amazing person.

So all of you who are in LDRs, suspend in there! However, if you feel its not working for you, don’t waste yo time, budge on. All the best to everyone! xoxo

The author of this blog was in a LDR that didn’t work. Evidently.

Finish bull, they can work, it all depends on how loyal you both are to maki g it work, my damsel and i have been in a long term for a good while now, I trust her more than i trust my own friends here, we spend every minute of our days with each other. Movie talks don’t count? Like hell they don’t, we spend every minute knowing where each other is, we see each other go to sleep, we see each other go to work and we see each other come back from work. We share our psysical intimate emotions and act them out woth each other frequantly. We basically keep a permanent connectio. Over skype, like literally when shes at work, i see her empyty bedroom and we get the feeling that they are never indeed that far away, it feels like were always close by. Then when they come home, its like how every other duo is like when one comes home from work 🙂

Wow! This blog has gotten far! It was posted two years ago? Or so. But still heating up!

As for the author! I say, good job! It means your topic is interesting! 🙂

It’s very interesting. I am married, and on my 1rst year of marriage. Since my spouse and I met we were leaving close to each other (just have to cross the street) than I stir to another city, we got married a few months after that now he left our hometown and live in Africa now.

This is very hard

Hi, Melissa. You sound like a chick after my own heart. 😉 I love writing as well – especially about relationships.

A key point that others have made is that you should not inject a long-distance relationship casually – which is one reason why it truly can only work for those looking for a serious relationship – which among other things means that you should be willing in principle to relocate. If you’re not willing to relocate – stop, do not pass LDR Go. 😉

The strengths of a LDR is that if coerces you communicate at length with your playmate, and thus to build a relationship in large part on communication. Not being dispelled by physical desire has its pluses and negatives. Positive: it permits to concentrate on getting to know someone deeply without sexual distraction. Negative: it may waste your time by postponing the inescapable question of whether you feel sexual chemistry or not. You can practice pretty good "phone" or "email" of "skype" chemistry, but that is not the same.

I just emerged from an LDR. We didn’t break up because of long-distance, however that very likely accelerated the process.

Last comment you must be joking

I have been in a long distance relationship for two years now, and we haven’t met at all in this time. we stay in touch through every mean possible, and to be fair this is the best relationship i have been eve. There is trust and whenever we talk we have so much to share and we also send presents and letters to each other to keep the romance going! our relationship is not based on hook-up and physical togetherness, its more spiritual and fully based on communication. We talk everyday and always have so much to say!

My long(ish) distance relationship has lasted all year, I’m pretty astonished. However, we did have almost a year of eyeing each other every day, all day prior to being one hundred miles away. It wouldn’t be that bad of a distance if we didn’t have class.

What works with ours is that we skype each other, and don’t flake on each other for visits. We alternate visits based on gas money, finals, etc.

Something that I noticed was that the time away from him actually gave me more perspective on how much he meant to me (because I miss the days we spent all day together), and vise versa.

We are only going to different colleges now, but after we graduate it will be no problem to live together again. 🙂

I met my beau three years ago, when we were living in the same town. We collective two wonderful years together and grew very close. A year ago, circumstances meant I had to stir to the other side of the country. As much as we loved each other, neither of us thought we could cope with a long distance relationship, especially as we were used to being so close. It would be too hard. We determined not to officially break up when I moved, but to permit things to gently drift apart, communicate less and less, leisurely going back to our individual lives.

And now I have very first palm practice that LDRs CAN work. Admittedly we were together for two years before forearm, but I’m sure it can be true too for those meet when distance is already an issue. The most significant factor is that you are with the right person, whether in a CD or an LDR. If you trust that person, love sharing your life with them, and receive the same in come back, love will take its own course.

I ready for the worst, and was totally throated away by the best. True love will ALWAYS find a way :’)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with Long Distance Relationships. I’m in one right now and I couldn’t be more satisfied. People think they don’t work but they do. I know someone who met their gf online and they got married and have a beautiful baby boy. Me and my beau have our arguments but its NORMAL in a relationship. The moving in together is effortless. He wants out of his house and I want him in mine. No matter the distance whether its next door or one thousand five hundred miles apart, you are roped to have the occasional argument. Happens in every relationship. Whether you get over it or not is the question. I couldn’t be any more satisfied with my life where I stand. My beau is presently sleeping online and the only reason I’m on here is because I just had a conversation with a friend telling me I’m stupid because 99.9% of LDR’s don’t last. So I am doing research. I love my beau and I wouldn’t switch anything in the world. Also lovemaking is not the key to a healthy relationship. Lovemaking has ruined my past relationships actually. So For Your Information, I’d sooooo rather have an adorable loving conversation with my man than have hook-up. Hook-up means nothing except hookup. Unless you are attempting to have a baby there is truly no need for it. I’d rather cuddle in bed and see movies than have lovemaking. So for people telling LDR’s are trussed to cheat I say BS! Have the willpower to stay true to your gf/bf and everything will be fine. Don’t let anyone tell you different. With all that said..Time for me to go to sleep with my honey. Goodnight all!

Hi. I’m in this incredible, yet amazing situation. I’m ultimately dating a dear friend with whom we realized we collective mutual feelings unknowingly until after I finalized my divorce. we were both shocked once the talks began but felt comforted and giddy about our fresh dynamic. My former marriage had been over for years unluckily. basically I was cheated on from the commence and there was never a ‘true marriage’. I never legally left for fear of the traditional ‘disrupt’ of family wholeness for our children. I came to embrace my strength of leaving and finding someone for not only myself but also spotted my decision as a wonderful future step for my children as well. It took so long for me to reach this place, and I embrace it now with convenience and enthusiasm. now, amazingly, I feel as if I’ve been given a chance for future love with someone who has always collective my values, and we simply ‘just get each other’. the problem is, our fresh relationship has just begun, just a month and a half prior to his military relocation midway across the US. due to my divorce, it is actually convenience as well as a good omen for my children and i to budge as well. I happen to have such plasticity and timliness to be able to begin a fresh life somewhere else. why should I not stir closer to my fresh beau to give things a chance to grow? i have no intention of cohabitating of course, but i truly feel in my gut that i want us to have a chance to grow. my fellow has mentioned that he is wary of longdistance relationships and he is so hopeful of lodging down one day soon and beginning his own family. we talked about this many times during our ‘solo friendship’. i don’t want to weigh down our beginning relationship with what could be interpreted as a ‘mighty gesture’ however i don’t want to adolescently end what could grow into a fine thing and i have the mobility and convenience to budge near him when he moves. how do i treatment this? i have every intention in doing things ‘traditionally’ bc i want a good man in my life to stay this time around. thank you for reading and i look forward to your responses.

the key is patience some people are just meant to be no matter situations like this

Ive been in a long distance relationship for four months now. i haven’t even met my fiancé, albeit i do know i love him very much and he means everything to me. we communicate by talking on the phone and texting alot. he lives in California and i live in Indiana. he ask me to marry him and i said yes and we plan on living where hes at, albeit i know this is going to be hard on my kids. i have been divorced for over four years now and i have been searching for my soul mate and i know hes the one for me and i love him with all my heart and soul and I know he feels the same way about me. hes suppose to be coming to visit me within the month and im very excited but i also feel ripped, because my daughter doesn’t want to stir there. she is fourteen and has all of her friends here.i have dated several people where i live and i have never felt so much in love as i do with my fiancé. i know most people would think i was crazy, sense we haven’t met, but in my heart i know hes the one for me and i want to be with him and we plan on marrying in about a year. i was very hurt in my divorce and i have made many mistakes dating the wrong man and i believe god has put us together. i have waited along time to feel blessed again and i feel i deserve to be glad again, but my kids are depressed about moving and my daughter gets very angry when i talk about it, i don’t want to hurt her but im totally in love with my fiancé and i want to be with him, am i doing the right thing by moving? were suppose to stir back to Indiana when his daughter graduates school in about five years. he has joint custody and doesn’t want to leave his daughter that’s why he wants to stay where he is, albeit he feels bad about my situation as well. please give me some advice my daughter is fourteen and is going to be in high school and her friends means alot to her. i attempt to explain to her that she will make fresh friends but she doesn’t want that and menaces me and tells me that she will stir in with her dad and gets very angry at me when i mention moving. am i being selfish to wanting to be blessed and budge so far away when i know its upsets her so much. i don’t want to liberate my daughter, but i also don’t want to liberate my fiancé. please if anyone could give me some good advice i would appreciate it greatly. thank you

Im in a long distance relationship iv been with my beau for a while n the past 3months he’s been gone. we’ve only had one fight n it wasn’t a bad one. Yes its very hard not witnessing him I miss him like crazy but trust is a very big part I trust him n he trust me I no he don’t want anyone but me n same goes here if u indeed love someone it can be done. Just talk as much as possible. And if u truly love some one distance only maters to the mind not the heart

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I will have to agree with you Op. I guess it won’t be so hard on people who haven’t spent some good time with each other. The chick I recently asked out, we were plane mates for three months. When she moved back to her country, I was indeed sad. We kept in touch for fairly a few months once or twice every week. We always have been close friends. Recently after a few days of asking her on a date (she never rejected it and told me that she had expected that this was coming), we had a misunderstanding and had a bad fight. The sad part is that both of us hold on to our anger for fairly some time and we are not talking to each other for some time (however I apologized). I just keep wondering how things which were so good became so ugly. I think this is one thing which makes LDR difficult.

Cathy five years ago from Louisiana, Idaho, Kauai, Nebraska, South Dakota, Missouri

This is an interesting subject to me. After being in a nine year relationship, my beau was transferred to the east coast. It lasted for about two more years and collapsed four days before Christmas. We remain friends because we share a lot of history including losing parents. It’s a healing process. I go from thinking I have the storybook because it was a excellent relationship and longlasting one. There are so many emotional elements involved with a committed relationship. When it no longer involves the "committed" part, you put on your big female pants so you can hold your chin up and embrace memories that were positive and the valley, well, who likes to cling to the valley? It’s sad and sad and it needs to heal from an unexpected heart earthquake.

LDR can be very hard. Im kinda in one right now, and things embarked off wonderful, but each day goes by and I become more sad and frustrated. Ive never met anyone I felt like this for, and at times i feel its hopeless, but at times I feel there is a lot of hope. I do think they can work out if you have the two right kind of people. LDR’s are not for everyone and a lot of trust and dedication is needed. I spend many nights secretly in tears because I just wish I had the money to go see him, even for just a few days. Im just about always in a state of heart ache. But I have faith in my heart that in the end it will work. You just have to have faith and trust and determination. And both sides of the relationship must want the same things, being on the same page. Its understandable why many don’t believe it would work. Its not something everybody can do. Good luck to anyone in a LDR.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Wow, there are some heated comments up in here. Let’s all attempt to be nice, shall we? This is my only hub that makes me want to stop responding to comments. You guys are killing me here!

karthikkash: Thanks for helping me out and responding to these comments! I appreciate you sharing your thoughts in a kind way.

Andrew: BE NICE. Your comment isn’t going to help anyone because it was written in a mean tone. You can write the same thing without being mean. HOKAY?

Bullshit 🙂 mine works ideally fine, we never argue and we fall in love more deeply every day. He lives on the other side of the planet, which is nine hours flight, and it’s truly expensive to visit eachother, minimum: about Trio.000$, but we still make it, cause the love is so true. Im about to turn 17. Now what are you bullshitting about? Mabybe its just you.

Cherrylips1993 five years ago

Thank you so much @karthikkash i indeed appreciate that

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

It indeed depends on both of you Cherrylips.. If you both are willing to make it happen, it may work. There will be a lot of difficulties, but if you both are willing to string up in there, then it may work.

Cherrylips1993 five years ago

hey i indeed need help well my beau is about to go into the airforce for four years and i will be completing up college im going to school for nursing i indeed love him and he truly love me but i truly wanna know if our relationship will work out long distance?

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

cannot say Annie. Don’t assume that he is falling for you. I have a friend who is one of my closest friends. I think about her everyday. Been in touch with her almost every week. We have spent a few weeks traveling together, partying and everything. However, I have never thought of coming in a relationship with her (not that I didn’t find her attractive). I love someone else and still love her tho’ I get utterly pissed off with her sometimes and feel like quitting on her (by the I am not in a relationship, I recently asked her out and it is long distance).

A fellow I like has a gf in Portugal and he lives and works here for the past six years, he never mentions her AT ALL, he has worked with me for seven months and today was the very first time he’s mentioned her, he went home in August and not again until xmas, and then went home at the weekend but I mentioned I loved a certain hot chocolate (back in January as a random talk we had) and he has a terrible memory usually but he came in today with a bag of the brand of hot chocolate. now he is very friendly with me and nobody else at work, we talk outside work and his bod language indicates he likes me (mirroring deeds, standing close, smiles and staring for long periods of time while talking, etc) and I like him too. He has said he trusts me, etc. and he tells me a lot about his days off/weekends/etc and then he goes home to see her yet takes the time to think of me whiles he’s there to go out and buy me that!! Is that a LDR failing or what??

PS. Having said that, if I fell in love with someone from a different country, I would attempt an LDR anyway (despite the setbacks). However, one or the other would have to stir nearby – most likely within a year or so.

Evidently, this hub has hit a raw nerve for many of our fellow readers. How interesting. And I wonder why? Here is what I am worried about with regard to long distance relationships: They are a bit like make believe. When LD paramours are together, everything is lovely because they have missed each other and they get to keep experiencing the honeymoon. When they are not together, they get to imagine everything is lovely, primarily due to not having been around to see the other person’s indeed annoying habits. In day to day, same city relationships, we get the real deal – the good, the bad, and the ugly. I’d rather have that. That way, I know who I’m indeed dealing with. and I can determine just how worthwhile he is.(By the way, 78% of studs will not admit to cheating.) I liked your post very much and I agree with you. There are exceptions to everything, but I suspect they are infrequent indeed.

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I have a very close friend who is in a relationship for the past eight years. Her beau is working in a different country. They see each other once in six months. She once told me that however she drapes out with a lot of guys, it has never ever crossed her mind to either cheat or breakup with her beau. I know her bf and I for one, know that he is never going to cheat on her nor breakup with her. Having said that, she tells me that it does hurt a lot not watching for so long. They talk to each other very regularly.

So yes, LDR can be very painful, but can workout if both are willing to sacrifice certain things.

Yeah Jacko’s right. Its laughable to see people right that they have met online and are waiting to meet up. That they talk via phone and that they are in love more than ever. Idiots! You cant love someone you’ve never met in person, you purely zeal for them because its a challenge them being so far away and you cant wait to meet this person who "is amazing" as soon as you do, all that build up will be gone, and the challenge over. That’s not love you fools. Go and get some ball-sac and meet someone (a real person, not words on a screen) and learn what real love is! It takes time with a person. And other fools who right that they trust someone they met overseas on a holiday, and cant see them much. Well hello, you fell for the dude who was hot and nice on holidays, who tells you hes so into you and you say the same. Hold out for someone you’ve met and gotten to know. I bet had you actually had a real face to face relationship, you would realise they have flaws and they arent just awesome. But your holding out for them because you think things will be superb, like they were when you met, forever. Christ its called the honeymoon phase, except this finishes and you learn to love your playmate for their flaws and their pros. You cant love someone you met for a week and haven’t seen in months. Get over it and stop wasting time

And to those of you who think ive got no clue and am opinionated, ive been with my gf for four and a half yrs. She moved five hrs away a few months ago for uni, we still make sure we see each other once a week. And even that is difficult. All the love for her i have, i can not assure we will be together in a year. If she was here with me i could assure that. We trust each other fully, are best friends, but if we witnessed each other any less, it wouldn’t work. Im a realist

This article is right. You people are idiots who disagree. Up top Karringtyn wrote telling shes in the best relationship shes ever been in. Hmmm sorry to say but eyeing someone once every six weeks is ridiculous, if that’s built the best relationship you’ve ever been in then that’s sad. And others who say it gives you a chance to "not take them for granted" to "concentrate more on communication and not lovemaking" um hello but hookup is one of the most significant factors in a good relationship. As is trust. If you have trust in someone but don’t have hookup, they might as well be your friend. If you don’t have good hookup, you arent going to be pleased, every person has needs, and when you lack good quality hook-up your relationship will end. No one remains sated in a relationship where the hookup deep throats. Long distance relationship means no loving, or little loving. Hence why when those needs are not met, people tend to cheat. You can trust your playmate 100%, but if you don’t see them enough, you cant be physical and a good relationship needs physical and mental love. A long distance relationship can work if you still see each other in person at least a duo times a month, but even then that’s going to make it hard. Quality time together is what makes you compatable, not computer talk or movie talk. So stop kidding yourselves, if you want to make distance work, go and see your fucking partner more then once every six weeks! You both deserve that, and if you don’t and honestly think they arent going to stray, good luck thinking that long term. Once every six weeks is not a relationship pfft

Lol, you say "I merely wrote this to demonstrate why LDR are hard". I’m sorry..is that why your title reads "Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships NEVER Work". Did you leave behind the "never" 😉 it’s okay, I forgive you for your ignorance. As far as your article, most times I would say "I respect your opinion, but disagree" everything you’ve mentioned is bias and opinionated. You basically put something out here that couokd potentionally harm than do good. You might as well have told suicidal people "Five Reasons Why You Should Pull The Trigger". I think this article is utterly bias coming from a person who seems to know a little bit about LDR but yet has never been in one or exepericenced it through another..per se. Friend, etc. I guess I could go off and tell gay people "Five Reasons Why You’re Not Normal". No, I don’t know you, but lady I know enough from reading this to get an idea 🙂 speak I’ll of it if you wish. I don’t care about you. But just know your stuff and gather facts before you make bold claims such as the ones I came across here today 🙂 thank you for your time it was very "insightful". I learned how bias people are about topics they know nothing of..what’s that called..ignorance 🙂

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

All the best for that Skinny 🙂 I can related to the exact screenplay. I was in touch with that special one through skype, facebook and phone. But then I found one thing that tho’ I dreamed to take it further, there would be too many practical issues which had to be treated apart from the distance. I had certain ambitions and I found that the LDR I was contemplating was indeed not worth it when compared to them. So I eventually had to drop the plan. I would choose a relationship with someone living in my own country however far she is. At least, it will be lighter to travel and meet each other.

My gf and i have been together for two years. she lives miles from my place. I came to know her because she is working in my country.. we get along fair enough. ups and downs

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Marisa: Sorry that you’re going through a rough time. Time will tell if your love will prevail.

Julie Thomson: I understand your point, but relationships are about more than trust. Yes, trust certainly helps with the very first few points I made. But there are problems that can arise in a LDR that aren’t present if you date someone near you (like the moving problem). Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

MR: What you wrote is a good example of a problem that an LDR may practice that doesn’t involve trust (i.e. what I wrote to Julie above). I can’t even imagine observing your significant other only once or twice a year. That’s truly hard! Hope things work out for you.

Vinaya Ghimire: Glad to help!

rungirlsl: Thanks for commenting! I love the comments on here that aren’t just yelling at me for telling something bad about LDRs.

Mr J: UK to Australia?! I’d say you CERTAINLY win the LDR badge. You may pick it up at the next window. 🙂

I feel sick because my gf moved 9hrs drive away and I know that all of the above is true, it’s been a year now and its leisurely getting more and more frustrating for me.

I hate it, I hate the unpreventable thought of a break up because it took me nineteen years to find someone like her, I don’t want to wait another nineteen 🙁

Im in my very first LDR right now, i met the fellow when i was on holiday over summer, in August, it was love at very first view as we intantly fell for each other. The thing is we spent ONE day together and im youthful, im eighteen and hes 17. We have been doing this relationship for six months now, i feel more connected to him than ever, i truly indeed feel something, i don’t know how to explain it and i don’t know if its love, still to this day i get butterflies when we talk over the phone. My parents tell me that im to youthful to know what love is but this feeling for him is so strong, i mean i have not been tempted once to cheat and its weird because before i left for that holiday i was the most boy crazy teeneger anyone could ever meet, now when im with my friends and they see a ‘hot’ stud i don’t know i just get an pic of my beau and im just like yeah guys, MY Beau IS HOT. I’m indeed glad because this way i know for sure im not being used because theres no hookup involved, we talk 24/7, when hes at a party he calls me so that im ‘ther with him’. Im not gonna get to see him until June, its Indeed hard tho’ im not gonna lie and im not speaking about trust because i trust him 100%, the only hard thing is missing him, especially when im at work and i see couples everywhere, but im staying strong cause i have this feeling inwards that this is right. I talk to his sisters (who iv never met before) over the phone, facebook, skype and they too believe that we are doing the right thing and asure me they have him on check lol, Im going to University next year in the city he’s in, i hope that it does work out and i want to thank all the people who collective their positive stories of LDR, i feel very motivated now. Thanks

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I think I win the long distance relationship badge, I live in the UK, she lives in Australia! A long five months ahead!

chriszones2012 five years ago

I AGREE Enthusiasm AND ROMANCE ADDS TASTE TO LIFE BUT WAT IS NUTRITIOUS IS THE MATURITY AND UNDERSTANDING, AND I THINK IVE HAD ONE WITH HER. ONLY THING LEFT IS TO TASTE IT WHICH WE KNOW WE WILL SOON :). AND HAVING SOMEBODY AFTER INQUISITIVELY WAITING FOR YEARS MAKES IT EVEN TASTIER. THAN EATING SOMETHING TASTY DAILY .

I HOPE Y’ALL GET IT

Long distance relationships DO NOT work unless one of the parties involved is, or is planning on relocating. And, I must point out, most of the posters on here who claim success have only been in a long distant ‘relationship’ for an average of two years, which is not a long time at all. I would be persuaded if couples were together for five or more years, but that doesn’t seem the case. Trust me on this; if your significant other runs into someone who lives closer to them, and they’re attracted to them, they’re going to bolt from you to be with someone who’s a little more convenient. And, you can’t blame him/her either.

I had this LDR’S with spanish man and i were in England.and its failed.lots of promisess he made, and he even asked for money and i did sent him a money.how stupid i’m.and now i fall in love again with a stud who is in australia.i was afraid to fall in love again as i truly don’t wanna get hurt.and he made me fall in love so madly and i truly want to be with him for the rest of life.we are just about to meet next week,but seem his love is fading.its hurts me so much again and i truly don’t want this relationship failed.

Why do I feel like this blog was written by someone who has never truly gone through an LDR before, with their entire heart in it? I am in an LDR, three hours apart, met online, and he is the best man I have ever known. We plan to be married, and I can say that I am so appreciative for him, and this LDR has permitted me to rely on communication and openess in a way I have never even experienced in my past CD relationships. This blog is biased.

Vinaya Ghimire five years ago from Nepal

I don’t believe in long distance relationship, but I never thought about the reasons. Thanks for sharing.

Julie Thomson five years ago from Connecticut

He doesn’t understand all of my frustration because he has way more patience but it frustrates me to the point where I am always so mad at him. I don’t know what to do.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

JustKeepSmiling: Your question is a hugely complicated one to reaction. It’s one of those topics that people could write books about. Do you begin preparing yourself for an forthcoming heartbreak before it happens or give your all in your relationship while it’s going well? I don’t think there is a right response. I think it’s whatever you want to do, whatever you feel more convenient with, whatever your heart is telling you is right. But you know what? I’m more apt to say give your all. If you’ve determined to proceed being in this relationship for now, that’s what you should do: Be in the relationship. I’ve learned that attempting to prepare yourself for bad things to happen NEVER works. the bad things end up hurting way more than you could even imagine, even with your preparing. So live your life for today. Appreciate what’s happening in the now. None of us are assured tomorrow, so love your relationship as it is presently. Leave the heartbreak for when it actually happens (if it does). Best of luck to you.

JustKeepSmiling five years ago

My current bf and I have been dating for two years, and our relationship has pretty much been rock solid. I go to boarding school in the UK and he goes to boarding school in the states, and we both live in Hong Kong. (I know, I know, we’re youthful! but I think two years is proof that this isn’t some kind of puppy-dog love/fling, right?) We usually get to see each other a few times during Christmas and a few times during the summer. There were slight ups and downs but overall it’s been amazing.

Last night was his last night before he had to leave again, and he all of a sudden asked me, "Am I worth it?" I asked him what he was talking about, and he told me that it would be at least seven years before he could come back home to live here permanently, and that it was impractical for us to have to miss out on so much on life because we’d sacrifice going on holidays with family/friends and stuff just to see each other. The thing is, it wouldn’t be such a big problem if it weren’t for the fact that he’s embarking university coming september and. well, we all know what american university (colleges?) can be like when it comes to partying and drinking etc. It’s a totally different lifestyle, and we’ll very likely get to see each other even less than we do now.

I suppose you might say that I’m youthful, and I might get over it, and that I’m not even an adult yet etc, but love is still love, and agony is still anguish. Heartbreak is still heartbreak, and. I just don’t truly know what to do.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

I undoubtedly disagree with this !! Ldr aren’t negative .. Let’s just say if it’s meant to be it’ll be !!

I was in a LDR with my ex of one year. We met last Christmas, and we hit it off indeed prompt. But I had to budge back to my home country two months into the relationship. But my ex called n texted almost everyday so we were fine, but then I didn’t have a job then, so we had all the time to talk. I went back to his city three months later, his families and friends like me a lot. I stayed at his city for one month then I went back to my home country. Things began to fall off when I embark my job since we had less time to talk. So in one incident, we fought over the texting thing, and he asked I I wished a break from us, I asked him for his opinion, he said that this long distance thing is getting raunchy on us. So I asked if he wanna call time on it, he said it might be time to take a time out of it. I replied ok. Later he texted telling I was being more than patient, understandable n reasonable. The next day I texted him " thank you for the good times and sorry for the bad, I wish things were different, and that I wish him happeness". He replied" hey, there were no bad times, I am sorry for being distant, I haven’t learnt to let work go, I don’t wanna give u false hope, I am who I am. Switch possible but slender. I have serious commitment issues, which are not healthy for relationships." I replied" wish u success at work, bye" He replied" wish things were different too.. Take care. Keep smiling" I miss him a lot. Don’t know if I should contact him again. I know I like him n he does the same. I kinda want to get back with him, don’t know if he feels the same. I know he isn’t ready to commit to marriage. And he said he is holding me back. I miss him, Should I contact him?? Help !!

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Josephine Falnor: I’m glad that your relationship works well. However, your one positive practice doesn’t negate the fact that sometimes LDRs are raunchy. And sometimes they don’t work. I wrote this article to merely point out the reasons why they’re hard. Thanks for your comment.

Dave: Yes, it does depend a lot on the people involved. Everyone has different practices in life, and no two people are the same.

caramelsky: Good story. And you brought up a good point about having a plan to budge/budge in together. this is the best way to ensure that a LDR survives the distance. Thanks for commenting.

We have a better relationship than anyone other duo we know that are actually together.

If there is trust then you have nothing to worry about and skype movie calling makes it lighter.

i don’t know what to do

caramelsky five years ago from the Central Coast

Our relationship is mostly based on trust, communication, and personality. I’ve only seen him around ten times over this year, and yes it can be hard, and yes I miss him sometimes. but I believe it’s beyond worth the petite wait when you meet someone so special. That one or two years waiting isn’t anything compared to the life you could spend with each other later once you officially got together. I plan on moving up there after school to attend a community college while he joins the Air Force.

It takes a fine deal of strength and patience (I’m not the best at either of those, haha). but remembering that something and someone so special is waiting for me makes it lighter to suffer the space inbetween us.

Wonderful article however, and superb view points. Even with all the bad things that could happen, there are always the long distance relationships that do work. They just take two loyal and faithful people who are willing to wait for each other.

I met a chick online about a year and a half ago. she is from Spain and I am from Fresh Zealand. After talking for about a year I flew over to see her and stayed with her for a month. I guess in this time we truly fell for one another even however it was a brief period of time. we said that we were in love with each other after I guess three weeks but we had been communicating for a year, and I indeed did fall in love with her. anyway I flew back to NZ about six months ago and I haven’t seen her since and in this time we talk on the net but she is a uni student and cannot afford to fly here to meet me so I have been saving to pay for her. well to cut a long story brief (ladies your gonna hate me) a few weeks ago I went out on the town and got truly toasted with some friends and when I was in a indeed drunken state of very likely not being able to communicate to a five year old child I fell into the temptation of another woman, which my bod has been longing for so long like an earth pounding hammer inwards me and regretfully I slept with her. When I woke up in the morning I felt like throwing up (and it wasn’t the hangover). I didn’t even know her name and she didn’t know mine.. I asked her what happened last night and she said we were inebriated and she was on the rebound. I didn’t know what to do so I called her a cab and sent her home.. I didn’t even ask for her name because I didn’t want to know and I will never see her again in my life. This happened about two weeks ago and in the meantime I have booked a ticket for the female who I am in a long distance relationship with to fly over to see me from Spain. When we talk on skype now I feel a sick feeling in my tummy and I look at my face in the little window with discust and can’t believe how I could do that to her. I have truly commenced to hate myself and develop depression. I don’t know if I should tell her because I know it would break her heart, and we would have no chance of being together.. but all my friends who I told it about are telling me that I am not even in a decent relationship so just tell myself it was a mistake and never do it again.. just budge on and leave it in the past where it belongs. So that is what I am attempting to do now but the bad feeling wont go away. I have no idea why I did it.. I know drinking is no excuse. I guess I just needed to pack something that was missing in my life that my figure was longing. Anyway that is my story and I will tell everyone now that Long distance relationships are freakin hard. I don’t go to nightclubs anymore because I am not exactly an ugly boy and woman are always attempting to flirt with me. I know she will never find out..but I HATE to keep secrets from her I am her very first love and she is so beautiful and unspoiled. to make it worse I was thinking of proposing to her when she arrived but now I cannot bring myself to do it. I think I will wait at least another six months and then see. My advice for guys in LDR’s is don’t ever let yourself get into a vulnerable position especially if you are drinking and have not seen your LDR gf for ages.. If you are missing the touch of a woman stay away from nightclubs or anywhere that involves alcohol!

Suffice to say it depends on the people involved.

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work, PairedLife

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work

People in long distance relationships are like the kid in your class who does the extra hard math problems at the end of each section just for joy. Or the person who wakes up at 4AM to run sixteen miles every day, up a mountain in the rain. They’re doing what most of us do, except they’re making it a thousand times stiffer than it needs to be. Relationships are often confusing, brain-hurting messes of enigmas, even without five thousand miles in inbetween you and your significant other. Add distance in and hoo boy, are you in for a bumpy rail.

Never is a harsh word. But it’s lighter to say than "More often than not, these relationships don’t work out" or "In most cases, they usually don’t work out." So what I indeed mean is: Here are some reasons why you should think twice before commencing a long distance relationship. Because they, more often than not, in most cases, don’t work out.

1) It’s Hard to Trust Someone You Hardly See in Person

When it comes to trust, talk is cheap. Anybody can say they’re trustworthy. Anyone can say they love you. But you need to see it to believe it. Real genuine trust is shown in a person’s deeds, not just words. In long distance relationships, you see each other so infrequently that it’s harsh to build up that trust. You visit each other, then go back to your separate lives, without a clue what the other person is doing while you’re away for the next five weeks. How are you supposed to build long lasting trust?

Two) It Usually Leads to Cheating

Unlike cheating when your significant other lives down the block, cheating in long distance relationships is slightly understandable. [However by a very meager percent. Cheating is terrible, and I very suggest not doing it to anyone.] You can’t see your significant other whenever you want, unlike in most relationships, and you’re only human. Most people would only be able to hold out for so long before the arms of somebody way more convenient (and local) commence looking real good. If you’re one of the good ones, you’ll end your long distance relationship before it comes to the cheating stage. But it’s effortless to be tempted if you’re thinking there’s no way your significant other will find out about your straying.

Three) Distance Leads to Frustration. Frustration Leads to Fighting. Fighting Leads to Break Ups. It’s the Inescapable Cycle of Long Distance Relationships.

Nobody thinks about the distance in their relationship and goes, HOORAY! This is so much joy! It’s frustrating, for everyone. You’re embarking off your relationship at a point of frustration. Yes, frustration leads to fighting, which leads to breakups in general, but you’re beginning your relationship with frustration. Most relationships begin off at a neutral point. If things get bad later, it’s because differences and incompatibilities build up, creating a frustrating situation. With long distance relationships, the frustration is built right into the fabric.

Four) These Relationships Go on Way Longer Than They Should.

In brief distance relationships (nobody calls them that, but just go with it), when things commence getting truly bad, a break up usually happens shortly after. [A lot of brief distance relationships also go on way longer than they should. People haul relationships out in general.] But the reason why long distance relationships almost ALWAYS go on longer than they should is because of the distance.

Five) You’ll Never Have a Future Unless You Live in the Same Place.

It’s pretty hard to begin a family when you live in different states. This is visible, but it seems to be something a lot of long distance-ers don’t truly think about until the relationship isn’t going so well. You get frustrated by the distance and then it’s "You need to stir here or this isn’t going to work." Well, that was always true. even when you were thinking about beginning the relationship. In order to have a real future with someone, you have to live in the same place. Relationships are hard enough. Commencing a relationship off without even having that plain requirement met makes it a zillion times stiffer.

If you indeed want a long distance relationship to work, it’s best to have a plan to end the distance soon. Don’t make relationships stiffer than they have to be, for weeping out noisy. Life is hard enough. Think twice before you bring a situation into your life that’s going to make life even stiffer for you. The person better be "the one," with bells and whistles and singing birds, to be worth all that effort. Otherwise, take a stroll down to the local watering crevice and find a date there instead.В

Your turn: What was it that made your long distance relationship end? Or, what has made your long distance relationship work?В

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Comments

As a matter of fact I as an old tradition thought have to agree with the fact that the most normal, from natures point of view too relationship is the one where the playmates are close to each other. However nowadays a lot of people including me have switch this idea making it possible to accomplish long distance relationship and made it possible enough to take place into the real world and not in the fantasy world as you wish to call it my dear. it is indeed hard for an Internet relationship to work out some of the time but not most of them. We neither know whether or not the possibilities of making one LDR are less than the ones of a cdr. And let’s be totally fair here it is also a fact that cdrs don’t always work out as imagined or planned by both or one of the playmates. According to your article my dear I can see that most of the things lack evidence during to the unknown number of successes by the relationships that commenced from a ld. Yes life is hard and the real world is harsh, but letc not also leave behind that this real world that most of the people wish to call can be affected by many parts like politics and economics. there are people out there who did things out of imagination such as flying to the moon creating clone humans, inventing robots, finding cures for deadly viruses and turning the unlikely into possible, so if you think for a moment if we compare all those which might seem kinda of unrelated but if you compare all those you can say that making an LDR is not indeed that unlikely

If you begin to love someone who is near you while you secretly attempt to keep your ldr, its a mistake. Ask yourself honestly about whether you indeed just love what your imagination lets you see. If that may be the case, cut off your ldr and take the time to know whether you are glad with what you do have. If you are persuaded you indeed want the ldr, then you get yourself near that person to see if it works in the skin. Don’t delay.

This is a stream of crap. LD CD whatever love is love. I never intended to fall in love with someone in Australia. Living in the US makes that about as LD as you can get. However, the best part of this relationship is indeed what I just said. I absolutely never intended to fall all in love with someone eight thousand miles away from me. But it happened and I’d be a loser not to work my bootie off to make this work until one of us moves. You may only be blessed with true love once. If it’s real it will work!

th0ught two years ago from Central Fresh York

They certainly are difficult, but as I mentioned in my hub, not unlikely. 🙂

I met a man nine months ago and when we met he did tell me that a stir was in the pipeline due to a very profitable business promotion. Of course at the time I did not give it too much thought as we did not realise at that stage that we would fall in love with each other. He relocated two months ago and it’s been simply awful. When he comes to me or if I go to him we still don’t get quality time together as he is always busy with work, clients etc. crimson flags did pop up originally eg I have two petite Pekingese dogs that he is not too keen on, he is addicted to the TV. Now however they have become meaty issues. I think we broke up via text messaging last night, but I’m not even sure of that. Lol.

If your man is a good communicator maybe it is lighter, but in my case it is truly an aweful practice. We may have not worked out anyway but the agony is being spread now.

Pardon me for telling this but the above article if i may call it an article is a loosely written lump with absolutely no reference to what practice these alcoholic ramblings of the author originate from. I have never read a more one sided argument in any subject whatsoever. And to go to the extent of telling that cheating is understandable? It is ABSOLUTELY NOT..So am i to believe that you are ok with your bf sleeping with another woman or your gf sleeping around with other guys while on a business journey or out of town simply because he/ she is lonely and depressed?. Cheating represents the betrayal of emotions and can be as ordinary as an ”virginal lie” said to ”protect” the other or can go as far as sleeping with another person.Both are exceptionally wrong and exceedingly stupid. I hope this isn’t the way you truly feel about LDRs and i Truly hope you just posted this lump as a dare from your friends to write something funny.

I married my long distance relationship this year. It was slightly different because he was in the army but the trust thing was hard because of a damsel he’d been with. When he went home for Christmas she posted fountains of pics of her hugging him and they even stayed in the same hotel room! I have to say, me and him did see eachother every two weeks tho’ because we were both in Europe even tho’ one thousand miles apart.

Grace-Wolf-30 four years ago from England

The kid in class who does the extra hard question just for joy turns out to be a mathematical genius, with a indeed excellent job, and the person who wakes up at 4am every morning to go for a sixteen mile jog, regardless of the weather, has a healthy heart, fantastic lung capacity, and a silent mind. Every relationship is unique, and should be treated so. You know in your heart what is right and what is wrong for you. Nothing worth having comes effortless.

lifeintheworld four years ago from The World

Meh. I was in a long distance relationship for three years. Ended up moving to the same country, still together today. If the people are worth it and put in the effort, it will work.

I could write about how my bf and I have been making it through with a entire ocean separating us – or you could just read about it here: http://surviving-thedistance.blogspot.co.at/

Everyone who is telling they are in a long distance relationship fail to mentinon who is moving? so you’re in one. and? eventually someone has to budge. And for those who’s LDR worked. did you budge? there is no way its going to work because resentment will commence to build up..You will want that person here with you through the good times and especially the bad.

But this past weekend, I did something horrible. I went to a concert and drank so much alcohol. After eight or nine shots, I was making out with a man who came with me and my girlfriends. I ended up telling this fellow that I find him truly attractive and that him and I would be good together as a duo.

Unluckily, it didn’t end there. Since then we’ve been texting each other. He came to visit me last night at my workplace, and we ended up smooching each other and making out.

I no vanessajoie! It’s very lonely and your rite it is like a marathon! Only thing to do is to keep busy I find. Skype is good tho’ we talk on it almost every night talk about our day to each other.

my SO and i met last two thousand eight and had a tornado romance, we were separated by distance after six months because he went to the states and im left here in the Philippines (imagine the miles apart) we stayed in touch and after a year he came back but was only able to stay for less than two weeks, again we didn’t see each other for two years but the love and communication is still there. last april two thousand twelve he came to see me again for three weeks. He’s now back in the states and wont be able to see him again for two years.We’ve had marriage talks so we can be together ultimately but something makes the situation complicated everytime.he loves me and i do too. earnestly, i feel like a marathon runner that’s almost reachin the end of race only to be told that they have moved the finish line further. . :(( we’ll be celebrating our 4yr anniversary this september and four years in a row that we have had never celebrated it together. Im still holding on and he does too but i admit im hurting that i cant be with him as often as i want too. Its gettin so lonely for me now.

Looks like my entire marriage, which began with watching him for the very first time in person at our 7th "monthsary" then the 2nd time after our very first anniversary, is a lie then.

This is a very interesting article, and you’ve certainly made sure to make it as controversial as possible. I used to believe that long-distance relationships were unlikely. I went through many in my life and they never worked out. I always felt I needed that physical companionship.

My current playmate and I have been separated by and ocean for almost two years now. Albeit it is unlikely difficult and I’ve had several moments of weakness, especially for physical companionship, we are still going on strong. I suppose a part of this is due to the fact that we have a daughter together. We are also very close to reuniting and that keeps us both motivated to keep going on.

dashingscorpio five years ago

LDRs were meant to be makeshift. At some point for things to last someone has to determine to budge!

Interesting hub! I think what’s significant to recall however is that a lot of long-distance relationships don’t begin out that way, they do embark when you’re living in the same place or relatively close by, it’s just that life might haul you apart. In this case, I truly have to disagree with the very first two points you made. It’s not hard to trust someone you love, and if it is then you most likely shouldn’t be with them in the very first place. And if you truly love someone, then you won’t even think about cheating on them.

Silas Kessler five years ago

Honestly, this article has no concrete backbone to support itself on. It makes it seem like EVERY person in a LDR is gonna cheat, lie, fight, etc. People are people, and we all have different ways of coping with things. I am presently in a LDR with a female in South Korea, and I’m in the US. I’m Nineteen, and have never had a relationship. (Brief or Long distance!) I’ve had many, many chances, but I’m just picky. This female on the other forearm is special. She is so different than any other woman I’ve met, so i very doubt I’ll get sick of her, and go to the "watering slot" to find some cheap cockslut, because I wouldn’t let my woman go for anything. Distance is nothing, and the day we meet will be like nothing else. We will savour every 2nd together, rather than take it all for granted.

Hi! I have been in a long distance relationship for Feb 2010. We began talking on Facebook and then Sype and then I eventually went to meet him while he was back packing round the Far East in the May. We where madly in love!

He called it a day Just after Fresh year 2012. I found it very difficult. I persuaded him after three months to get back together! I love him very much but we have big problems. He live on an island and I live on the British main land. I have five children one of which has left home. I still have the other four who are dependant on me, because I have been a total time Mum for a long time I need to go back to education so I can find a well paid job. This will take me a further four years. He hates where I live and doesn’t want to live over here with me so the only other option is for me to live over there but it looks almost unlikely for me to do that because house prices are so high where he lives. The money from the sale of my house wouldn’t even get a one bed plane where he lives. He lives with his parents still because of this! There is no room at his parents for my family. I don’t go out much because I don’t want to attract the rong sort of attention because I still have my looks! I feel Totally isolated and lonely! I find this way of living very difficult!

My Mum had a stroke one and a half years ago. My only sister died nine years ago and my Dad.I had aunts and uncles die in the last few years too! I just feel life is to brief what should I do?

Feel like I’m in a no win situation!

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

I think Lawrence pretty much has all these comments covered. Thanks for looking out, friend.

Lol, glad to be in the minority then.

England-Australia long distance. In a relationship for coming up to four years now, applying for permanent residence with my fucking partner as a sponsor in Australia on Monday.

Feels good to be awesome.

A truly good blog. So true what Lawrence says, and also so much true in all comments.

I have been a LDR over three thousand kilometers for Ten. years, but now it seems we are violating up. He wrote a mail telling he needs a break, and I do not truly know why now, except that our love had cooled down little by little over the years. Maybe because no one could ever see him or herself moving to the other country. The trouble is, now we are not the youngest anymore, so I doubt if I will ever have a playmate again, and I am indeed afraid of getting nowhere again in a relationship.

I’ve personally known several individuals who’ve had largely incorporeal relationship for years (and have experienced this myself). It strikes me as in large part being about playing a romantic game – a game where one can pretend to be experiencing this excellent romance that involves constant starving for the other that is never fairly fulfilled (or even partly fulfilled) – but in reality you’re actually avoiding true romance, which requires lots of up-close and private interaction, commitment to making your lives together work, and so forward.

dionne wilson five years ago

so true, its nice at 1st but unless some1 eventually relocates its a dead deal

Got to say this blog is crap. I was in army for 6years with my gf at home in uk me in Germany and we managed 6years and now been out 4years and since then her job takes her away for 3or four months then back for one then away for 3months and were still together. Secret is if u care about each other from the embark and give each other time to live there life’s as they choose but keep in contact when it apart then it works.

I’m in LDR myself, its still early days tho’. We met during the festive season and it was love at very first view. We spent about a month together before he had to leave to another country. We’ve been together for 5months now and haven’t seen him in 4months. Its truly hard I must say, not for the faint-hearted. We talk everyday via Skype, txts and phonecalls even tho’ its expensive. We love each other dearly and not a 2nd passes without me thinking about him.

So all of you who are in LDRs, suspend in there! However, if you feel its not working for you, don’t waste yo time, stir on. All the best to everyone! xoxo

The author of this blog was in a LDR that didn’t work. Evidently.

Finish bull, they can work, it all depends on how faithful you both are to maki g it work, my lady and i have been in a long term for a good while now, I trust her more than i trust my own friends here, we spend every minute of our days with each other. Movie talks don’t count? Like hell they don’t, we spend every minute knowing where each other is, we see each other go to sleep, we see each other go to work and we see each other come back from work. We share our psysical intimate emotions and act them out woth each other frequantly. We basically keep a permanent connectio. Over skype, like literally when shes at work, i see her empyty bedroom and we get the feeling that they are never indeed that far away, it feels like were always close by. Then when they come home, its like how every other duo is like when one comes home from work 🙂

i found this interesting,but not all couples that having long distance relationship cant work out. just right now,my fiancé and i longed for two years and still going strong,you have to learn to trust each other,accept the mistakes,and to stay glad..everyone knows what’s the best for ourlives..

Wow! This blog has gotten far! It was posted two years ago? Or so. But still heating up!

Anyways, i am too in a ldr and weve been together for one year and half now. The reason why i read this blog is because it catches my attention, just like most of you guys. I cant see anything wrong on what the blogger wrote. We just have to respect her on her opinion. 🙂 if that’s what she belive in, then so be it. But you see, we know what’s going on in our LDRs right? Yes its hard, yes its confusing at times, its a bit frustrating. But i smile while reading this, it makes me proud on my LDR because i know in my heart and in my mind that may boo and i have a strong kind of relationship and does not fall into what the author said. You see, even if i tell you our story and why ldr work for us, you wouldn’t indeed get to feel it because you are not in my situation. And its only US who knows the real score inbetween us. 🙂

As for the author! I say, good job! It means your topic is interesting! 🙂

It’s very interesting. I am married, and on my 1rst year of marriage. Since my spouse and I met we were leaving close to each other (just have to cross the street) than I budge to another city, we got married a few months after that now he left our hometown and live in Africa now.

This is very hard

Hi, Melissa. You sound like a damsel after my own heart. 😉 I love writing as well – especially about relationships.

A key point that others have made is that you should not come in a long-distance relationship casually – which is one reason why it truly can only work for those looking for a serious relationship – which among other things means that you should be willing in principle to relocate. If you’re not willing to relocate – stop, do not pass LDR Go. 😉

I just emerged from an LDR. We didn’t break up because of long-distance, however that most likely accelerated the process.

Last comment you must be joking

I have been in a long distance relationship for two years now, and we haven’t met at all in this time. we stay in touch through every mean possible, and to be fair this is the best relationship i have been eve. There is trust and whenever we talk we have so much to share and we also send presents and letters to each other to keep the romance going! our relationship is not based on lovemaking and physical togetherness, its more spiritual and totally based on communication. We talk everyday and always have so much to say!

I don’t entirely agree with the author, obviously they couldn’t build on the LDR. It takes time and a lot of patience to make it work! Especially if you have plans for the future, a little shouldn’t get in the way! If you love each other and trust each other, and are more like friends then a relationship will work, whether its a long distance or CD.

What works with ours is that we skype each other, and don’t flake on each other for visits. We alternate visits based on gas money, finals, etc.

Something that I noticed was that the time away from him actually gave me more perspective on how much he meant to me (because I miss the days we spent all day together), and vise versa.

We are only going to different colleges now, but after we graduate it will be no problem to live together again. 🙂

I was once negative about LDRs. I could never understand why people would willingly inject one when there were so many challenges. I certainly never thought I would. Yet I have, and almost by accident.

I met my bf three years ago, when we were living in the same town. We collective two wonderful years together and grew very close. A year ago, circumstances meant I had to budge to the other side of the country. As much as we loved each other, neither of us thought we could cope with a long distance relationship, especially as we were used to being so close. It would be too hard. We determined not to officially break up when I moved, but to permit things to gently drift apart, communicate less and less, leisurely going back to our individual lives.

Did that happen? No. We found that we couldn’t possibly stop talking, skyping, sharing things with each other. And there was no way we could bring ourselves to ultimately go our separate ways. We were simply too in love. And now, a year later, I of all people am in a thriving long distance relationship.

And now I have very first palm practice that LDRs CAN work. Admittedly we were together for two years before arm, but I’m sure it can be true too for those meet when distance is already an issue. The most significant factor is that you are with the right person, whether in a CD or an LDR. If you trust that person, love sharing your life with them, and receive the same in come back, love will take its own course.

I ready for the worst, and was totally sucked away by the best. True love will ALWAYS find a way :’)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with Long Distance Relationships. I’m in one right now and I couldn’t be more satisfied. People think they don’t work but they do. I know someone who met their gf online and they got married and have a beautiful baby boy. Me and my beau have our arguments but its NORMAL in a relationship. The moving in together is effortless. He wants out of his house and I want him in mine. No matter the distance whether its next door or one thousand five hundred miles apart, you are tied to have the occasional argument. Happens in every relationship. Whether you get over it or not is the question. I couldn’t be any more satisfied with my life where I stand. My bf is presently sleeping online and the only reason I’m on here is because I just had a conversation with a friend telling me I’m stupid because 99.9% of LDR’s don’t last. So I am doing research. I love my beau and I wouldn’t switch anything in the world. Also hook-up is not the key to a healthy relationship. Lovemaking has ruined my past relationships actually. So For Your Information, I’d sooooo rather have an adorable loving conversation with my man than have hook-up. Hook-up means nothing except hook-up. Unless you are attempting to have a baby there is indeed no need for it. I’d rather cuddle in bed and observe movies than have hook-up. So for people telling LDR’s are strapped to cheat I say BS! Have the willpower to stay true to your gf/bf and everything will be fine. Don’t let anyone tell you different. With all that said..Time for me to go to sleep with my honey. Goodnight all!

Hi. I’m in this incredible, yet amazing situation. I’m ultimately dating a dear friend with whom we realized we collective mutual feelings unknowingly until after I finalized my divorce. we were both shocked once the talks began but felt comforted and giddy about our fresh dynamic. My former marriage had been over for years unluckily. basically I was cheated on from the begin and there was never a ‘true marriage’. I never legally left for fear of the traditional ‘disrupt’ of family wholeness for our children. I came to embrace my strength of leaving and finding someone for not only myself but also spotted my decision as a wonderful future step for my children as well. It took so long for me to reach this place, and I embrace it now with convenience and enthusiasm. now, amazingly, I feel as if I’ve been given a chance for future love with someone who has always collective my values, and we simply ‘just get each other’. the problem is, our fresh relationship has just begun, just a month and a half prior to his military relocation midway across the US. due to my divorce, it is actually convenience as well as a good omen for my children and i to budge as well. I happen to have such plasticity and timliness to be able to begin a fresh life somewhere else. why should I not stir closer to my fresh bf to give things a chance to grow? i have no intention of cohabitating of course, but i truly feel in my gut that i want us to have a chance to grow. my stud has mentioned that he is wary of longdistance relationships and he is so hopeful of lodging down one day soon and beginning his own family. we talked about this many times during our ‘solo friendship’. i don’t want to weigh down our beginning relationship with what could be interpreted as a ‘mighty gesture’ however i don’t want to adolescently end what could grow into a superb thing and i have the mobility and convenience to stir near him when he moves. how do i treatment this? i have every intention in doing things ‘traditionally’ bc i want a good man in my life to stay this time around. thank you for reading and i look forward to your responses.

the key is patience some people are just meant to be no matter situations like this

Ive been in a long distance relationship for four months now. i haven’t even met my fiancé, albeit i do know i love him very much and he means everything to me. we communicate by talking on the phone and texting alot. he lives in California and i live in Indiana. he ask me to marry him and i said yes and we plan on living where hes at, albeit i know this is going to be hard on my kids. i have been divorced for over four years now and i have been searching for my soul mate and i know hes the one for me and i love him with all my heart and soul and I know he feels the same way about me. hes suppose to be coming to visit me within the month and im very excited but i also feel ripped, because my daughter doesn’t want to budge there. she is fourteen and has all of her friends here.i have dated several people where i live and i have never felt so much in love as i do with my fiancé. i know most people would think i was crazy, sense we haven’t met, but in my heart i know hes the one for me and i want to be with him and we plan on marrying in about a year. i was very hurt in my divorce and i have made many mistakes dating the wrong man and i believe god has put us together. i have waited along time to feel glad again and i feel i deserve to be blessed again, but my kids are depressed about moving and my daughter gets very angry when i talk about it, i don’t want to hurt her but im totally in love with my fiancé and i want to be with him, am i doing the right thing by moving? were suppose to stir back to Indiana when his daughter graduates school in about five years. he has joint custody and doesn’t want to leave his daughter that’s why he wants to stay where he is, albeit he feels bad about my situation as well. please give me some advice my daughter is fourteen and is going to be in high school and her friends means alot to her. i attempt to explain to her that she will make fresh friends but she doesn’t want that and menaces me and tells me that she will budge in with her dad and gets very angry at me when i mention moving. am i being selfish to wanting to be blessed and budge so far away when i know its upsets her so much. i don’t want to liberate my daughter, but i also don’t want to liberate my fiancé. please if anyone could give me some good advice i would appreciate it greatly. thank you

Im in a long distance relationship iv been with my beau for a while n the past 3months he’s been gone. we’ve only had one fight n it wasn’t a bad one. Yes its very hard not observing him I miss him like crazy but trust is a very big part I trust him n he trust me I no he don’t want anyone but me n same goes here if u indeed love someone it can be done. Just talk as much as possible. And if u truly love some one distance only maters to the mind not the heart

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

Cathy five years ago from Louisiana, Idaho, Kauai, Nebraska, South Dakota, Missouri

This is an interesting subject to me. After being in a nine year relationship, my bf was transferred to the east coast. It lasted for about two more years and collapsed four days before Christmas. We remain friends because we share a lot of history including losing parents. It’s a healing process. I go from thinking I have the storybook because it was a good relationship and longlasting one. There are so many emotional elements involved with a committed relationship. When it no longer involves the "committed" part, you put on your big woman pants so you can hold your chin up and embrace memories that were positive and the valley, well, who likes to cling to the valley? It’s sad and sad and it needs to heal from an unexpected heart earthquake.

LDR can be very hard. Im kinda in one right now, and things commenced off wonderful, but each day goes by and I become more sad and frustrated. Ive never met anyone I felt like this for, and at times i feel its hopeless, but at times I feel there is a lot of hope. I do think they can work out if you have the two right kind of people. LDR’s are not for everyone and a lot of trust and dedication is needed. I spend many nights secretly in tears because I just wish I had the money to go see him, even for just a few days. Im just about always in a state of heart ache. But I have faith in my heart that in the end it will work. You just have to have faith and trust and determination. And both sides of the relationship must want the same things, being on the same page. Its understandable why many don’t believe it would work. Its not something everybody can do. Good luck to anyone in a LDR.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Wow, there are some heated comments up in here. Let’s all attempt to be nice, shall we? This is my only hub that makes me want to stop responding to comments. You guys are killing me here!

karthikkash: Thanks for helping me out and responding to these comments! I appreciate you sharing your thoughts in a kind way.

Tman: I’m not indeed sure what to say to you. The title is an attention grabber. In the 2nd paragraph, I wrote that I don’t mean to say that LDRs NEVER work. I even bolded it for you. If you can’t read that far down, that’s not my problem. And how dare you compare this article to an article telling suicidal people why they should commit suicide. That’s amazingly offensive, and I’m telling NOTHING of the sort. Yes this article is opinionated. It’s MY OPINION. You don’t have to agree with it. You don’t have to like it. But don’t come on my article and tell me I might as well have been telling suicidal people to kill themselves. I’m not even telling people in LDRs to break up! Where did you get a comparison like that? Lord help me.

Andrew: BE NICE. Your comment isn’t going to help anyone because it was written in a mean tone. You can write the same thing without being mean. HOKAY?

Cherrylips1993 five years ago

Thank you so much @karthikkash i indeed appreciate that

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

It truly depends on both of you Cherrylips.. If you both are willing to make it happen, it may work. There will be a lot of difficulties, but if you both are willing to string up in there, then it may work.

Cherrylips1993 five years ago

hey i indeed need help well my bf is about to go into the airforce for four years and i will be completing up college im going to school for nursing i indeed love him and he indeed love me but i indeed wanna know if our relationship will work out long distance?

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

A man I like has a gf in Portugal and he lives and works here for the past six years, he never mentions her AT ALL, he has worked with me for seven months and today was the very first time he’s mentioned her, he went home in August and not again until xmas, and then went home at the weekend but I mentioned I loved a certain hot chocolate (back in January as a random talk we had) and he has a terrible memory usually but he came in today with a bag of the brand of hot chocolate. now he is very friendly with me and nobody else at work, we talk outside work and his assets language indicates he likes me (mirroring deeds, standing close, smiles and staring for long periods of time while talking, etc) and I like him too. He has said he trusts me, etc. and he tells me a lot about his days off/weekends/etc and then he goes home to see her yet takes the time to think of me whiles he’s there to go out and buy me that!! Is that a LDR failing or what??

Evidently, this hub has hit a raw nerve for many of our fellow readers. How interesting. And I wonder why? Here is what I am worried about with regard to long distance relationships: They are a bit like make believe. When LD paramours are together, everything is lovely because they have missed each other and they get to keep experiencing the honeymoon. When they are not together, they get to imagine everything is lovely, primarily due to not having been around to see the other person’s truly annoying habits. In day to day, same city relationships, we get the real deal – the good, the bad, and the ugly. I’d rather have that. That way, I know who I’m indeed dealing with. and I can determine just how worthwhile he is.(By the way, 78% of studs will not admit to cheating.) I loved your post very much and I agree with you. There are exceptions to everything, but I suspect they are uncommon indeed.

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I have a very close friend who is in a relationship for the past eight years. Her beau is working in a different country. They see each other once in six months. She once told me that tho’ she drapes out with a lot of guys, it has never ever crossed her mind to either cheat or breakup with her bf. I know her bf and I for one, know that he is never going to cheat on her nor breakup with her. Having said that, she tells me that it does hurt a lot not witnessing for so long. They talk to each other very regularly.

So yes, LDR can be very painful, but can workout if both are willing to sacrifice certain things.

Yeah Jacko’s right. Its laughable to see people right that they have met online and are waiting to meet up. That they talk via phone and that they are in love more than ever. Idiots! You cant love someone you’ve never met in person, you purely eagerness for them because its a challenge them being so far away and you cant wait to meet this person who "is amazing" as soon as you do, all that build up will be gone, and the challenge over. That’s not love you fools. Go and get some testicles and meet someone (a real person, not words on a screen) and learn what real love is! It takes time with a person. And other fools who right that they trust someone they met overseas on a holiday, and cant see them much. Well hello, you fell for the boy who was hot and nice on holidays, who tells you hes so into you and you say the same. Hold out for someone you’ve met and gotten to know. I bet had you actually had a real face to face relationship, you would realise they have flaws and they arent just awesome. But your holding out for them because you think things will be superb, like they were when you met, forever. Christ its called the honeymoon phase, except this completes and you learn to love your playmate for their flaws and their pros. You cant love someone you met for a week and haven’t seen in months. Get over it and stop wasting time

And to those of you who think ive got no clue and am opinionated, ive been with my gf for four and a half yrs. She moved five hrs away a few months ago for uni, we still make sure we see each other once a week. And even that is difficult. All the love for her i have, i can not ensure we will be together in a year. If she was here with me i could ensure that. We trust each other entirely, are best friends, but if we spotted each other any less, it wouldn’t work. Im a realist

This article is right. You people are idiots who disagree. Up top Karringtyn wrote telling shes in the best relationship shes ever been in. Hmmm sorry to say but observing someone once every six weeks is ridiculous, if that’s built the best relationship you’ve ever been in then that’s sad. And others who say it gives you a chance to "not take them for granted" to "concentrate more on communication and not lovemaking" um hello but lovemaking is one of the most significant factors in a good relationship. As is trust. If you have trust in someone but don’t have lovemaking, they might as well be your friend. If you don’t have good hook-up, you arent going to be pleased, every person has needs, and when you lack good quality lovemaking your relationship will end. No one remains sated in a relationship where the hookup gargles. Long distance relationship means no loving, or little loving. Hence why when those needs are not met, people tend to cheat. You can trust your playmate 100%, but if you don’t see them enough, you cant be physical and a good relationship needs physical and mental love. A long distance relationship can work if you still see each other in person at least a duo times a month, but even then that’s going to make it hard. Quality time together is what makes you compatable, not computer talk or movie talk. So stop kidding yourselves, if you want to make distance work, go and see your fucking partner more then once every six weeks! You both deserve that, and if you don’t and honestly think they arent going to stray, good luck thinking that long term. Once every six weeks is not a relationship pfft

Lol, you say "I merely wrote this to showcase why LDR are hard". I’m sorry..is that why your title reads "Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships NEVER Work". Did you leave behind the "never" 😉 it’s okay, I forgive you for your ignorance. As far as your article, most times I would say "I respect your opinion, but disagree" everything you’ve mentioned is bias and opinionated. You basically put something out here that couokd potentionally harm than do good. You might as well have told suicidal people "Five Reasons Why You Should Pull The Trigger". I think this article is utterly bias coming from a person who seems to know a little bit about LDR but yet has never been in one or exepericenced it through another..per se. Friend, etc. I guess I could go off and tell gay people "Five Reasons Why You’re Not Normal". No, I don’t know you, but lady I know enough from reading this to get an idea 🙂 speak I’ll of it if you wish. I don’t care about you. But just know your stuff and gather facts before you make bold claims such as the ones I came across here today 🙂 thank you for your time it was very "insightful". I learned how bias people are about topics they know nothing of..what’s that called..ignorance 🙂

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

All the best for that Skinny 🙂 I can related to the exact script. I was in touch with that special one through skype, facebook and phone. But then I found one thing that tho’ I desired to take it further, there would be too many practical issues which had to be treated apart from the distance. I had certain ambitions and I found that the LDR I was contemplating was indeed not worth it when compared to them. So I eventually had to drop the plan. I would choose a relationship with someone living in my own country however far she is. At least, it will be lighter to travel and meet each other.

My gf and i have been together for two years. she lives miles from my place. I came to know her because she is working in my country.. we get along fair enough. ups and downs

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Marisa: Sorry that you’re going through a rough time. Time will tell if your love will prevail.

MR: What you wrote is a good example of a problem that an LDR may practice that doesn’t involve trust (i.e. what I wrote to Julie above). I can’t even imagine watching your significant other only once or twice a year. That’s truly hard! Hope things work out for you.

Vinaya Ghimire: Blessed to help!

rungirlsl: Thanks for commenting! I love the comments on here that aren’t just yelling at me for telling something bad about LDRs.

Mr J: UK to Australia?! I’d say you CERTAINLY win the LDR badge. You may pick it up at the next window. 🙂

I feel sick because my gf moved 9hrs drive away and I know that all of the above is true, it’s been a year now and its leisurely getting more and more frustrating for me.

I hate it, I hate the unavoidable thought of a break up because it took me nineteen years to find someone like her, I don’t want to wait another nineteen 🙁

Im in my very first LDR right now, i met the boy when i was on holiday over summer, in August, it was love at very first glance as we intantly fell for each other. The thing is we spent ONE day together and im youthfull, im eighteen and hes 17. We have been doing this relationship for six months now, i feel more connected to him than ever, i truly truly feel something, i don’t know how to explain it and i don’t know if its love, still to this day i get butterflies when we talk over the phone. My parents tell me that im to youthfull to know what love is but this feeling for him is so strong, i mean i have not been tempted once to cheat and its weird because before i left for that holiday i was the most boy crazy teeneger anyone could ever meet, now when im with my friends and they see a ‘hot’ boy i don’t know i just get an photo of my bf and im just like yeah guys, MY Beau IS HOT. I’m indeed glad because this way i know for sure im not being used because theres no hookup involved, we talk 24/7, when hes at a party he calls me so that im ‘ther with him’. Im not gonna get to see him until June, its Indeed hard tho’ im not gonna lie and im not speaking about trust because i trust him 100%, the only hard thing is missing him, especially when im at work and i see couples everywhere, but im staying strong cause i have this feeling inwards that this is right. I talk to his sisters (who iv never met before) over the phone, facebook, skype and they too believe that we are doing the right thing and asure me they have him on check lol, Im going to University next year in the city he’s in, i hope that it does work out and i want to thank all the people who collective their positive stories of LDR, i feel very motivated now. Thanks

Karthik Kashyap five years ago from India

I have never been in a long distance relationship. However, since I have a duo of closest friends in other countries, it holds true with that. In fact at one point of time, I had contemplated a long distance relationship. I liked that person so much but eventually had to drop it since we both were in different countries. Tho’ I knew that she liked me, it was pretty evident that it was not an effortless task for either of us to budge to the other’s country.

I think I win the long distance relationship badge, I live in the UK, she lives in Australia! A long five months ahead!

chriszones2012 five years ago

I AGREE Eagerness AND ROMANCE ADDS TASTE TO LIFE BUT WAT IS NUTRITIOUS IS THE MATURITY AND UNDERSTANDING, AND I THINK IVE HAD ONE WITH HER. ONLY THING LEFT IS TO TASTE IT WHICH WE KNOW WE WILL SOON :). AND HAVING SOMEBODY AFTER INQUISITIVELY WAITING FOR YEARS MAKES IT EVEN TASTIER. THAN EATING SOMETHING TASTY DAILY .

I HOPE Y’ALL GET IT

Long distance relationships DO NOT work unless one of the parties involved is, or is planning on relocating. And, I must point out, most of the posters on here who claim success have only been in a long distant ‘relationship’ for an average of two years, which is not a long time at all. I would be coaxed if couples were together for five or more years, but that doesn’t seem the case. Trust me on this; if your significant other runs into someone who lives closer to them, and they’re attracted to them, they’re going to bolt from you to be with someone who’s a little more convenient. And, you can’t blame him/her either.

I had this LDR’S with spanish man and i were in England.and its failed.lots of promisess he made, and he even asked for money and i did sent him a money.how stupid i’m.and now i fall in love again with a stud who is in australia.i was afraid to fall in love again as i truly don’t wanna get hurt.and he made me fall in love so madly and i indeed want to be with him for the rest of life.we are just about to meet next week,but seem his love is fading.its hurts me so much again and i indeed don’t want this relationship failed.

Why do I feel like this blog was written by someone who has never truly gone through an LDR before, with their entire heart in it? I am in an LDR, three hours apart, met online, and he is the best man I have ever known. We plan to be married, and I can say that I am so appreciative for him, and this LDR has permitted me to rely on communication and openess in a way I have never even experienced in my past CD relationships. This blog is biased.

Vinaya Ghimire five years ago from Nepal

I don’t believe in long distance relationship, but I never thought about the reasons. Thanks for sharing.

Julie Thomson five years ago from Connecticut

He doesn’t understand all of my frustration because he has way more patience but it frustrates me to the point where I am always so mad at him. I don’t know what to do.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

JustKeepSmiling: Your question is a hugely complicated one to response. It’s one of those topics that people could write books about. Do you begin preparing yourself for an forthcoming heartbreak before it happens or give your all in your relationship while it’s going well? I don’t think there is a right reaction. I think it’s whatever you want to do, whatever you feel more comfy with, whatever your heart is telling you is right. But you know what? I’m more apt to say give your all. If you’ve determined to proceed being in this relationship for now, that’s what you should do: Be in the relationship. I’ve learned that attempting to prepare yourself for bad things to happen NEVER works. the bad things end up hurting way more than you could even imagine, even with your preparing. So live your life for today. Appreciate what’s happening in the now. None of us are assured tomorrow, so love your relationship as it is presently. Leave the heartbreak for when it actually happens (if it does). Best of luck to you.

JustKeepSmiling five years ago

Last night was his last night before he had to leave again, and he abruptly asked me, "Am I worth it?" I asked him what he was talking about, and he told me that it would be at least seven years before he could come back home to live here permanently, and that it was impractical for us to have to miss out on so much on life because we’d sacrifice going on holidays with family/friends and stuff just to see each other. The thing is, it wouldn’t be such a big problem if it weren’t for the fact that he’s beginning university coming september and. well, we all know what american university (colleges?) can be like when it comes to partying and drinking etc. It’s a totally different lifestyle, and we’ll very likely get to see each other even less than we do now.

I asked him whether I was worth it, and he paused and said, "I don’t know." I know he loves me, and he told me that one of the reasons he wants to break up is because he doesn’t want to hold me back, and that he knows there are people out there who are better for me because of the shorter distance. After some discussion, we agreed that we’d attempt for another year (until next christmas, three months after he starts uni/college) and then see whether it still works. My problem now is. Do I commence distancing myself to prepare myself for the potential breakup, which could increase the risk of cracking up, or do I give it my all and throw myself into it etc but then be doubly crushed if it doesn’t work out anyway?

I suppose you might say that I’m youthfull, and I might get over it, and that I’m not even an adult yet etc, but love is still love, and ache is still agony. Heartbreak is still heartbreak, and. I just don’t truly know what to do.

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

I certainly disagree with this !! Ldr aren’t negative .. Let’s just say if it’s meant to be it’ll be !!

I was in a LDR with my ex of one year. We met last Christmas, and we hit it off truly prompt. But I had to budge back to my home country two months into the relationship. But my ex called n texted almost everyday so we were fine, but then I didn’t have a job then, so we had all the time to talk. I went back to his city three months later, his families and friends like me a lot. I stayed at his city for one month then I went back to my home country. Things began to fall off when I begin my job since we had less time to talk. So in one incident, we fought over the texting thing, and he asked I I desired a break from us, I asked him for his opinion, he said that this long distance thing is getting rough on us. So I asked if he wanna call time on it, he said it might be time to take a time out of it. I replied ok. Later he texted telling I was being more than patient, understandable n reasonable. The next day I texted him " thank you for the good times and sorry for the bad, I wish things were different, and that I wish him happeness". He replied" hey, there were no bad times, I am sorry for being distant, I haven’t learnt to let work go, I don’t wanna give u false hope, I am who I am. Switch possible but slender. I have serious commitment issues, which are not healthy for relationships." I replied" wish u success at work, bye" He replied" wish things were different too.. Take care. Keep smiling" I miss him a lot. Don’t know if I should contact him again. I know I like him n he does the same. I kinda want to get back with him, don’t know if he feels the same. I know he isn’t ready to commit to marriage. And he said he is holding me back. I miss him, Should I contact him?? Help !!

M. Rose five years ago from Orange County, CA

Dave: Yes, it does depend a lot on the people involved. Everyone has different practices in life, and no two people are the same.

caramelsky: Good story. And you brought up a good point about having a plan to budge/budge in together. this is the best way to ensure that a LDR survives the distance. Thanks for commenting.

We have a better relationship than anyone other duo we know that are actually together.

If there is trust then you have nothing to worry about and skype movie calling makes it lighter.

i don’t know what to do

caramelsky five years ago from the Central Coast

You bring up a lot of interesting points in this article, and a lot of them are true. I’ve been in a LDR for about a year now, and I feel more connected to my mate than I ever did with any CDR’s I’ve been in. He lives about five hours away and twenty minutes from some family I have up north whom I visit often. The only problem is we’re four years apart, and I’m too youthful yet. I’m looking forward to being able to stir out soon.

It takes a good deal of strength and patience (I’m not the best at either of those, haha). but remembering that something and someone so special is waiting for me makes it lighter to bear the space inbetween us.

I met a doll online about a year and a half ago. she is from Spain and I am from Fresh Zealand. After talking for about a year I flew over to see her and stayed with her for a month. I guess in this time we indeed fell for one another even however it was a brief period of time. we said that we were in love with each other after I guess three weeks but we had been communicating for a year, and I truly did fall in love with her. anyway I flew back to NZ about six months ago and I haven’t seen her since and in this time we talk on the net but she is a uni student and cannot afford to fly here to meet me so I have been saving to pay for her. well to cut a long story brief (damsels your gonna hate me) a few weeks ago I went out on the town and got truly tipsy with some friends and when I was in a indeed drunken state of most likely not being able to communicate to a five year old child I fell into the temptation of another woman, which my assets has been longing for so long like an earth pounding hit inwards me and regretfully I slept with her. When I woke up in the morning I felt like throwing up (and it wasn’t the hangover). I didn’t even know her name and she didn’t know mine.. I asked her what happened last night and she said we were buzzed and she was on the rebound. I didn’t know what to do so I called her a cab and sent her home.. I didn’t even ask for her name because I didn’t want to know and I will never see her again in my life. This happened about two weeks ago and in the meantime I have booked a ticket for the damsel who I am in a long distance relationship with to fly over to see me from Spain. When we talk on skype now I feel a sick feeling in my tummy and I look at my face in the little window with discust and can’t believe how I could do that to her. I have indeed embarked to hate myself and develop depression. I don’t know if I should tell her because I know it would break her heart, and we would have no chance of being together.. but all my friends who I told it about are telling me that I am not even in a decent relationship so just tell myself it was a mistake and never do it again.. just stir on and leave it in the past where it belongs. So that is what I am attempting to do now but the bad feeling wont go away. I have no idea why I did it.. I know drinking is no excuse. I guess I just needed to pack something that was missing in my life that my assets was longing. Anyway that is my story and I will tell everyone now that Long distance relationships are freakin hard. I don’t go to nightclubs anymore because I am not exactly an ugly boy and woman are always attempting to flirt with me. I know she will never find out..but I HATE to keep secrets from her I am her very first love and she is so beautiful and unspoiled. to make it worse I was thinking of proposing to her when she arrived but now I cannot bring myself to do it. I think I will wait at least another six months and then see. My advice for guys in LDR’s is don’t ever let yourself get into a vulnerable position especially if you are drinking and have not seen your LDR gf for ages.. If you are missing the touch of a woman stay away from nightclubs or anywhere that involves alcohol!

Suffice to say it depends on the people involved.

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work, PairedLife

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work

1) It’s Hard to Trust Someone You Hardly See in Person

Two) It Usually Leads to Cheating

Three) Distance Leads to Frustration. Frustration Leads to Fighting. Fighting Leads to Break Ups. It’s the Unpreventable Cycle of Long Distance Relationships.

Four) These Relationships Go on Way Longer Than They Should.

Five) You’ll Never Have a Future Unless You Live in the Same Place.

Related

God Centered Long Distance Relationships

Ten Most Effective Tips to Make LDR Last

How to Break Up With Your Long-Distance Bf or Gf

Ten Things To Do Together In A Long Distance Relationship

Popular

I Miss You Quotes, Messages and Poems for Your Gf or Beau

The Benefits of Long-Distance Relationships

How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work

Comments

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work

1) It’s Hard to Trust Someone You Hardly See in Person

Two) It Usually Leads to Cheating

Three) Distance Leads to Frustration. Frustration Leads to Fighting. Fighting Leads to Break Ups. It’s the Unpreventable Cycle of Long Distance Relationships.

Four) These Relationships Go on Way Longer Than They Should.

Five) You’ll Never Have a Future Unless You Live in the Same Place.

Related

God Centered Long Distance Relationships

Ten Most Effective Tips to Make LDR Last

How to Break Up With Your Long-Distance Beau or Gf

Ten Things To Do Together In A Long Distance Relationship

Popular

I Miss You Quotes, Messages and Poems for Your Gf or Bf

The Benefits of Long-Distance Relationships

How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work

Comments

Five Reasons Why Long Distance Relationships Never Work

1) It’s Hard to Trust Someone You Hardly See in Person

Two) It Usually Leads to Cheating

Three) Distance Leads to Frustration. Frustration Leads to Fighting. Fighting Leads to Break Ups. It’s the Inescapable Cycle of Long Distance Relationships.

Four) These Relationships Go on Way Longer Than They Should.

Five) You’ll Never Have a Future Unless You Live in the Same Place.

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